


Okay, Hotshot

by LetsWookiesWin (Ravenhoot)



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode V: Empire Strikes Back, Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Canon Divergence Solo Star Wars Story, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Han Solo Trilogy, Past Relationship(s), Sensuality, Star Wars Marvel Comics, Unintentional Incest, Unresolved Romantic Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-24
Updated: 2018-10-24
Packaged: 2019-08-06 18:17:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 23,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16392707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ravenhoot/pseuds/LetsWookiesWin
Summary: Han's been threatening to leave for almost 3 years and hasn't done it yet. But he's really going this time.Really.As soon as he tells General Rieekan and Her Worship.Here's a deeper look at their story, starting on Hoth with their unresolved romantic tension with some added extras of my own.Like, what happened on the way to Bespin since they couldn't go into lightspeed and it took weeks to get there? How did Leia deal with Han's absence after the escape from Cloud City? WhatwasHan's reaction to seeing Leia in that slave bikini? (Spoiler alert, he's not happy about it). And just how does Han react when he realizes Leia and Luke are siblings?Teen rating for some sensuality and language.





	1. The South Passage

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Not canon-compliant with _Solo: A Star Wars Story_ (but feel free to picture Alden Ehrenreich in your head during discussions of Han's past. I know I do *swoon*).
> 
> Much of Han’s backstory comes from the (now, non-canon) book series _The Han Solo Trilogy_ and the Star Wars Marvel comic series. While I completely adored _Solo: A Star Wars Story_ (no lie, it's my second favorite SW movie. Empire is my first, obviously.), I just read the books so long ago that **that** string of events is more firmly set in my mind. Still, when I picture Han in my head prior to _A New Hope_ , I see Alden Ehrenreich. I feel like he was perfect for that role (just my opinion, please don't crucify me if you disagree). Anyway, I just felt like I needed to explain that, since it seems like more people have seen the Solo movie than have read the books. 
> 
> Also, the dialogue and scenes taken directly from the film may be different from what many are familiar with. I tracked down some of the earlier versions of the scripts and used those to give it a little difference from the film. Some of them I liked a lot better than what was in the final film.

The moment he entered the Command Center, he instinctively turned his head in search for her white jumpsuit and brown plaited hair. He didn't even realize it, but whenever he entered Command, he looked for her. She was there of course; she was always there. He wondered when she ever slept. She was leaning over someone's chair, pointing at a readout on the screen in front of her. Han steeled himself for what he knew he had to do and turned his back to her, addressing General Rieekan. 

“General, I gotta leave. I can’t stay anymore.” _Don’t look at her,_ he chided himself. _If you look at her, you’ll lose your nerve and you won’t do it... like every other time._

Leia glanced up from the screen she’d been reading. Han had been threatening to leave for three years, ever since he’d given up the reward he'd been given for saving her from the Death Star. He had always found a reason to stick around at the last minute. But he’d never actually told General Rieekan he was leaving. That gave her cause for concern.

He could feel her eyes on him, boring into the back of his head. He looked at her. _Damnit!_ She looked disappointed, but also like she’d expected it.

She didn’t know why it mattered to her. Well, that was a lie. She _did_ know why, but she refused to allow herself to admit it. They were in the middle of a war and the Rebellion needed her. The last thing she needed was to lose her nerve because of some… moon jockey. A moon jockey who was suddenly looking at and speaking to her.

“Well, your Highness, I guess this is it.”

 _He does this all the time_ , she reminded herself. _No emotion. The Rebellion has to come first._ “That’s right,” she said hollowly.

His demeanor changed instantly. It was as if he’d been expecting her to beg him to stay (like she had in the beginning) or make some sarcastic retort that had become second-nature in their unending dance of verbal repartee. But it was clear he was not expecting her to just accept his departure from her life with such… indifference.

“Well, don’t get all mushy on me! So long, _Princess!”_ He practically spat the honorific as he spun and strode out of the command center.

 _He’s really going!_ Her heart pounded in her chest. She debated whether she should go after him or just let him go. Everyone, including General Rieekan, was staring at her. _What do I have to lose… besides him?_ She hurried out into the icy corridor and caught sight of him halfway to the hangar.

“Han!”

He stopped and turned, looking generally surprised to see her chasing after him. “Yes, your Highnessness?” Any vulnerability he’d shown mere moments ago in the command center had vanished. He had thrown back on his shield of sarcasm and spite, tools he used to keep anyone from getting too close.

“I thought you had decided to stay?” She tried to formulate it as a statement, but it ended up sounding more like a hopeful question.

“Well, that bounty hunter we ran into on Ord Mantell changed my mind,” Han admitted. He hadn't really wanted to go. Not anymore. At first, he couldn't wait to get away from all the Rebel fanatics, but over time, they'd grown on him. Especially the kid and the princess. If he was honest with himself, he liked having friends. But he couldn’t spend the rest of his life looking over his shoulder hoping he could stay one step ahead of Jabba’s bounty hunters; the stress alone would cause him to crack.

“Han, we _need_ you!” Leia pleaded. She couldn’t believe she was standing in the corridor, begging him to stay.

“We?”

“Yes!” Leia replied.

“Well, what about you need?” Han quipped. He was pushing her further than he’d ever pushed her before. Figuratively backing her into a corner, forcing her to acknowledge whatever unspoken thing there was between them.

“I need?” Leia repeated, mystified. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Han brought his arms up in an exaggerated shrug and began walking away from her again, retorting, “You probably don’t.”

Leia persisted, following him down the snow-packed corridor. “And what precisely am I supposed to know?”

This was it. He made a decision. He was tired of the last three years of flirtatious banter – winking at her while she gave briefings and watching her try to hide the coy smile that crept up her mouth. Or the one time they'd sought temporary refuge on a moon with so much heat and humidity, he'd had to peel a sweat-soaked shirt off after working on the _Falcon_ all afternoon and looked up to catch her trying to avert her stare (he certainly wasn't going around shirtless on this frozen hunk of rock they called a planet). If he was going to stay – going to risk his life by continuing to actively avoid repaying Jabba the bounty he owed – he was going to have a kriffing good reason. He would only stay if she admitted she had feelings for him.

“Oh, come on!” Han barked. “You want me to stay because of the way you feel about me!” There. He’d said it. He'd tried to toss in as much of his usual cocky swagger as he could with the hope that it would mask the underlying seriousness of the question. Now he forced himself to continue walking away from her when all he wanted was to turn around and see the answer he so desperately needed from her deep chocolate eyes.

“Yes!” Leia answered instinctively. Han nearly tripped. She hurriedly added, “You’re a great help to us. You’re a natural leader…” _No, you fool!_ She screamed at herself. _You want him to stay because every time he looks at you, your stomach does backflips and you can’t breathe. You want him to stay because the way he walks just sends a shiver down your spine. Why can’t you just tell him that?!_

Han rounded on her, pointing his finger accusatorily at her and said, “No! That’s not it!” It couldn’t be it. He knew he hadn’t imagined all those times he’d glanced up from working on the _Falcon_ and seen trying to pretend she hadn't been staring at him. She was deflecting. She had to be.

“Come on,” he said again. A Rebel soldier carrying a large case of supplies couldn’t get past them on either side, so he forced his way between them, completely unphased and ignoring their argument completely. Han and Leia bickered so often that most of the rebels had learned that when the Princess and the smuggler were hollering at each other, it was best not to interrupt.

“Haaa… Come on!” Han badgered. He wanted to hear her say it.

“You’re imagining things,” Leia shot back instead.

“Am I?” Han insisted. “Then why’re you following me? Afraid I was gonna leave without giving you a goodbye kiss?” He was angry again. No matter what angle he took, they always ended up at the same place. Denial.

“I’d just as soon kiss a Wookie!” Leia spat. She had no idea why she said it. Her eyes involuntarily darted up to Han’s mouth. Despite the vitriol he was presently emitting toward her, she imagined for what felt like the thousandth time what it would be like to actually kiss him. She pulled herself back to the present. He was shouting and storming off down the hall.

“I could arrange that! You could _use_ a good kiss!”

She stood shell-shocked, unbelieving that was how they would part ways. Suddenly, he was back in front of her, pointing accusingly at her again.

“Y’know, you’ve spent so much time being a princess, you never took the time to learn how to be a woman. Which is a shame, because you’ve got all the makings for one. I coulda helped you _plenty_ in that department… if you’d have only let go for a minute. But it’s too late, sweetheart. Your big opportunity is flying outta here!”

Leia gaped at him, blinking several times as if to make sure she hadn’t just imagined that last bit. But no, there he was, standing in front of her, eyebrows raised, waiting for a response.

“We’re fighting for a cause _much_ bigger—”

“Spare me, please!” Han snapped, cutting her off. He was letting his fury mask his severe disappointment from her rejection. “Don’t lecture me about your Rebellion _again_. I’ve had it with your noble mission! All you let yourself think about is the Rebellion. The result is you’re as cold as this planet!” He finished with a gesture to the walls made of tightly packed snow.

“Oh, and you think _you’re_ the one to apply some heat?” Leia retorted. She could be just as nasty as he could.

“I could…” Han mused, “but I’m not really interested anymore.” The moment the words passed his lips, he knew they were a lie. Truth be told, he was the most interested in her when she was all spitfire and tenacity. He needed a woman who could hold her own and despite what he’d just said to her about not learning to be a woman, she _was_ a woman who could most certainly hold her own. The trouble was that he’d reached the point where just _any_ fierce and fiery woman wouldn’t be enough – it had to be her or nothing.

Leia immediately felt the sting of his rebuff, but then noticed the clear divide between his words and the look in his eyes. A sly smile worked its way across her face. She laid a hand on his shoulder and practically purred, “Oh Han… Now we _both_ know that isn’t true.” She closed her open palm into a fist, lightly punched it against his shoulder, and said, “Enjoy your trip, hotshot.” She turned and made her way back to the control room at the quickest pace she could muster while still maintaining some dignity.


	2. Hoth

Leia watched the shield doors closing with a cold dread that had nothing to do with the subzero temperatures of this wretched planet. Her chest rose and fell with the deep breaths she was forcing herself to take to keep herself from crying. Princesses didn’t cry; and most certainly not in the main hangar where half the Rebel Alliance would see her lose control.

She worried for Luke. She felt this inexplicable bond with him. She wasn’t sure how, but she just knew their stories went together somehow. Not romantically, although she suspected Luke wanted them to be. She just felt something… deeper with him.

To make matters worse, Han was out there too. Han, who she’d yelled at the last time they’d spoken. What if he didn’t make it back and he died out there thinking she hated him? The doors slammed shut with an ear-splitting screech of metal-on-metal. Chewbacca threw back his head and howled a gut-wrenching sound of misery. Leia didn’t speak Shyriiwook but she could sympathize with the Wookie all the same. She stared at the sealed doors and couldn’t stop herself from wondering, _Did I lose them both tonight?_

*******************

Leia stood in the med-center watching anxiously as T-1B adjusted the settings on the bacta tank that Luke was fully submerged in. Though Han had been out in the elements all night, he’d refused medical attention, insisting the med-droid see to Luke first. Leia barely heard him come in behind her. They stood together for a moment, silently observing Luke’s progress.

Leia drew in a shaky breath and hugged her arms to her chest. She shivered, although whether it was from the cold or the fear that she almost lost the two most important people in her life, she wasn't sure. Han instinctively put an arm around her shoulder, their argument from the day before irrelevant now. Leia was exhausted; she hadn’t slept at all from the worry. As such, she leaned into Han, barely conscious of what was happening.

“I didn’t think you were going to come back,” she said quietly.

“Nah, you’re not gonna get rid of me that easy,” Han teased. “Besides, I couldn'ta died out there. If I hadn’t brought Luke back, you’d have killed me.”

Leia barely had the energy to acknowledge his joke. She made a soft _hmm_ and her eyes were so very heavy. She just wanted to close them for a moment… She slumped against Han, who caught her immediately. She jolted awake, insisted she was fine, but Han had already scooped her up and was carrying her to her chambers. She closed her eyes and rested her head against his chest.

“Okay, your Princessness. When’s the last time you slept?”

Her lack of reply and deep methodic breathing told Han she’d already succumbed to sleep. He reached her quarters, kicked the door opening mechanism, and set her down gently on her bed. He had halfway reached to smooth a stray strand of curly auburn hair from her face when he stopped himself. _She turned you down, remember? Let her go._

Han grit his teeth and backed out of her modest chambers, closing the door with a hiss. An announcement over the comms ordered all aircraft grounded until the energy shield had been activated. Han groaned aloud. He should have just left when he had the chance.

When Leia woke, she had no memory of how she got back to her room and the last thing she remembered was the feeling of profound relief when Rogue Two returned to the hangar with Han and Luke, both alive.

*******************

“I don’t know where you get your delusions, laser brain.”

Chewbacca chortled gruffly. Han regarded him with profound offense.

“Laugh it up, fuzzball!” He confidently strode over to Leia and put his arm around her shoulder, proclaiming, “You didn’t see us along together in the south passage… where she expressed her _true_ feelings for me.” His smug grin was too much.

Leia instinctively shrugged his arm off her shoulder and rounded on him. “My! Why you stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking… nerf herder!”

Han had had the decency to look ashamed until she’d gotten to calling him scruffy. Then his eyebrows furrowed, and he took genuine offense. “Who’s scruffy-lookin'?!”

He returned to stand next to Luke and surmised, “Must have hit it pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up like that, huh kid?” Han glanced back to gauge Leia’s reaction. He was a little stung that she seemed to be ignoring the brief moment of tenderness they’d shared in the med-center the night before.

Leia narrowed her eyes and strode purposely over to Luke and glared at Han while she snapped, “Well I guess you don’t know everything about women yet.” She grasped Luke’s face with both of her hands and pulled him forward, kissing him firmly. She released him and marched from the room without another word. She immediately felt guilty for using Luke like that, since she'd kissed him purely to spite Han. She couldn’t explain it, but kissing Luke had just felt wrong… like how she imagined kissing a brother would feel. It just reconfirmed her inexplicable feeling that she and Luke's destinies were not bound by romance. 

 _“I dunno, you think a Princess and a guy like me—”_  
“No!”  
Han had said it just to get a rise out of the kid. Luke was as transparent as glass and his attraction for the newly-rescued princess was evident. The princess  was beautiful, but she had too much mouth. Han didn’t take orders from anyone. He had enjoyed teasing the naïve farm boy. 

Han was remembering that moment now as Luke looked precociously smug, leaned back with his hands behind his head and a smirk about his lips. The irony was too much for him. He’d said those words in pure jest, but now he wished more than anything for it to be so. And just when he thought they’d made some real progress... She kisses _Luke?!_

[She did that just to make you jealous, you know,] Chewie said to Han. Han slowly turned to look at his Wookie friend with as much contempt as he could muster. _Ya think?_ He thought bitterly.

“Take it easy, kid,” Han said dismissively before he too exited the med-center.

*******************

Leia was darting around the command center giving half a dozen orders while climbing over large chunks of ice that had fallen from the ceiling.

“Are you alright?!” 

Leia snapped her head up to see Han shoving blocks of snow and ice out of the way to get to her.

“Why are you still here?” She snapped.

“I heard the command center had been hit!” Their eyes met very briefly. _And I had to make sure you were safe._ Why couldn’t he say that to her instead? 

“You’ve got your clearance to leave!” Was he imagining the acrimony in the way she said ‘leave’?

“Don’t worry, I’ll _leave_. But first I’m gonna get you to your ship.” He successfully adjusted the last hunk of ice blocking his path to her.

She scurried over another to one of the few screens still functioning and ordered, “Send all troops in sector twelve to protect the fighters!”

A blast from overhead shook the entire base. A staticky voice over the comm warned, “Imperial troops have entered the base!”

Han reached Leia and gripped her arm. He wasn’t letting her risk her life for her Rebellion. Not today. He gave her a stern look that he hoped told her he wasn't taking no for an answer. “Alright. That’s it.”

Leia nodded, accepting defeat. “Send the evacuation code. And get to your transports!” She ordered as Han ushered her out of the crumbling command center. They had barely begun racing down the corridor to get to Leia’s designated transport ship when another rumble from above shook the walls. Chunks of snow and ice exploded as Han forced Leia to the ground, shielding her from the debris.

Han pulled a comm device from his pocket and barked into it. “Transport, this is Solo. Better take off – I can’t get to you. I’ll get her out on the _Falcon_.” He took Leia’s hand and darted down the corridor toward the hangar where his ship and Chewbacca waited.

Leia stared at the pile of jagged ice chunks on the floor, realizing that if Han hadn’t come and gotten her, she would be crushed underneath them… or the ones in the command center. She gripped his hand and ran.


	3. Unstable Asteroid

The bad news was that the hyperdrive generator was damaged, so they were stuck traveling through realspace, which took considerably longer. The good news was that they were presently hidden inside a cave on an asteroid, so they had time to evaluate the damage and devise a plan instead of having to actively flee from the Empire.

They had landed inside the cave hours ago. After the adrenaline of escaping Hoth and the Star Destroyers had waned, they realized how hungry and exhausted they were. Chewie had produced some ration packs and after their meager supper, Leia suggested they all get some rest. With the ship unable to go into lightspeed, autopilot could still be set, but it would be safer to have someone in the cockpit whenever they left the asteroid in case they were attacked.

“Might as well all get some sleep while we’re parked,” Leia suggested.

Chewie looked apprehensively at Han; he knew how much Han hated anyone else giving orders on his ship.

“That... is actually not a bad idea,” Han agreed.

Chewie gaped at Han, who shot his first mate a look that plainly said ‘not now.’

Leia stood up but hesitated, looking lost. “You know, as many times as I’ve been on this ship, I have no idea where the cabins are.”

Han pointed to a corridor Leia had never paid attention to before.

“Refresher is through there and the cabins are directly across from it. Pick whichever one looks most comfortable, but fair warning - none of them are.”

“Where does Chewie sleep?” Leia inquired.

Han pointed down another corridor. “Chewie has remodeled the crew cabins into his own living space.”

Leia peered down the corridor Han indicated. The _Falcon_ was much bigger than she thought. Granted, she’d only ever seen the cockpit and the main hold. She almost asked where the Captain’s quarters were but stopped herself. She felt herself flush anyway. She retreated to the ‘fresher to wash her face and peel her sweltering snowsuit off. Even in the chill of space, it was scorching.

As soon as he heard the door to the ‘fresher hiss closed, Chewie rounded on Han. He said nothing but just stared at him incredulously.

“What?!”

[Nothing, nothing,] Chewie said. [I just never thought I would see the day when Han Solo would let another living soul give orders on this ship.]

“It wasn’t an order!” Han grumbled defensively. “It was a suggestion that I happened to agree with.”

[Sure, okay. Whatever you have to tell yourself to sleep.]

“Oh, give it a rest, will ya?”

Chewbacca laughed – the same chortle he uttered when Leia had called Han a laser brain. He lumbered past Han, pausing briefly to rub one of his massive furred paws over Han’s head, leaving Han’s hair a disheveled mess.

[ _Now_ you’re scruffy-looking.]

Han rolled his eyes as Chewie’s form disappeared down the corridor leading to the crew quarters. He craned his neck to see if the door to the ‘fresher was still closed. It was. He decided to hell with it and went straight to his cabin. The Captain’s quarters were modest compared to other ships, but still more than comfortable for his needs. He kicked off his boots, discarded his jacket from Hoth on the floor, and collapsed onto the bed.

*******************

Han jolted awake to the sound of someone shouting. Instinctively, he bolted out of bed and reached for his blaster. By the time he reached the Dejarik table, Chewie had appeared, crossbow at the ready. The sounds were coming from the main cabins.

“Leia!” Han said in a strangled whisper and darted down the corridor. He couldn’t understand why that damn droid hadn’t alerted. C-3PO had gone into power-saving mode but programmed himself to alert if anything got into the cave and triggered his sensors. When he reached the cabin doors, he skidded to a halt, holding his hand out behind him indicating that Chewie should do the same.

Chewie ambled up behind Han. When he saw the source of the commotion, he placed a furry paw on his friend’s back and gave him an encouraging nudge before returning to his own quarters. Han felt frozen to the spot. He holstered his blaster and took a tentative step toward the cabin with the open door. Leia was asleep on the bed, thrashing and moaning, occasionally crying out. She had wedged the jacket of her snowsuit into the door track to keep it from closing. Han thought for a moment and then the pieces clicked together.

The sleeping cabins on the _Falcon_ were roughly the same size as the detention cells on the Death Star (albeit, much more comfortable) but for someone who’d been held captive in one of those cells, Han could imagine how being inside with the door closed would be nerve-wracking. As for the nightmare, he wasn’t sure whether he should wake her up or let it pass. The decision was made for him, however, when she jerked awake with a stifled cry, sitting straight up and looking around wildly.

Her breathing was quick and shallow. She held her head in her hands and Han thought he could make out her mumbling, “Alderaan.” He never stopped to consider that the planet he had been chartering Luke and the old man to was Leia’s home. Of course he hadn’t. Because that would mean caring about someone else and that was dangerous. Caring about someone else had only caused him trouble in the past.

He apprehensively stepped into the cabin, moving slowly so he wouldn’t startle her further.

“Hey, your worship, it’s me... Han.”

“Han?” Leia repeated, clearly disoriented. “What are you doing in here?”

“You had a nightmare,” he explained sympathetically, still moving forward into the cabin. “You were pure screaming at one point.”

“Okay...” Leia said slowly. She sounded more alert and more like herself. “But what are _you_ doing in _here_?”

Han was taken aback. “I... I was coming to make sure you were okay.”

“Sure,” she snapped. “Are you sure you weren't trying to be the white knight who swoops in to console the poor princess? And then you’ll undoubtedly expect me to invite you into my bed in exchange for my gratitude, is that it? Well, you were sorely mistaken, flyboy.”

Han balked at her unexpected outburst.

“Whoa, your Highnessness, let’s set the record straight! You were screaming your head off so I came to make sure nothing was in the process of eating you or sawing your pretty little head off. But now that I see you’re still all in one piece, and with just as much charming contempt as you’ve always had, I’m going back to sleep. You couldn’t get me in that bed even if you offered to pay off the bounty Jabba has on my head!”

Han spun around and stormed out of the cabin, but paused briefly at the doorway. He considered snatching the jacket out of the door track to intentionally cause the door to close, but he couldn’t be that cruel. Her words had stung him yet again, but he couldn’t subject her to the terror of reliving her confinement on the Death Star. He stomped back through the main hold to his own quarters. He knew it would take him a while to fall back to sleep, but not for the reasons he thought. To his surprise, his anger with Leia quickly abated but he still didn’t get to sleep for over an hour, for every time he closed his eyes, he saw her thrashing and crying out... but he knew she didn’t want his help.

*******************

Chewbacca was sitting on the lounge seat of the main hold when Han emerged from his own quarters the following morning. He expected Chewie to give him a hard time about the previous night’s events, but to his own consternation, the Wookie gave Han a look of understanding commiseration and handed him a mug of caf.

“I take it you heard everything, then?” Han guessed.

Chewie softly growled an affirmative response.

Han plopped down onto the circular bench. He was exhausted and desperately wanted to go back to sleep, but they had a lot of work to do on the _Falcon_ if they hoped to get off this blasted asteroid anytime soon. They couldn’t depend on their luck holding out that the Empire wouldn’t find them.

Leia appeared from the ‘fresher a few moments later. There was an awkward moment of silent tension, broken by Leia getting Han’s attention and asking, “Can I talk to you?”

“Uh, yeah,” Han replied, not understanding that Leia meant alone.

The ship suddenly rocked violently, causing everyone - human, Wookie, and droid - to reach for whatever was closest to avoid falling.

C-3PO, always the observant one, turned to Han and commented, “Sir, it’s possible this asteroid is not entirely stable.”

Han gave the droid an incredulous look and remarked, “Not entirely stable? Well, I’m glad you’re here to tell us these things! Chewie, make the professor useful and plug him into the hyperdrive, will ya?”

As Chewbacca led Threepio in one direction, Han waved Leia to follow him toward the cockpit. Han flopped into the pilot’s seat but Leia remained standing, pacing slightly.

“I just wanted to say I’m... sorry,” Leia said.

Han raised his eyebrows but remained silent. He almost commented that he never thought he would see the day when Princess Leia would apologize and admit fault, but she was talking to him at a reasonable decibel and he didn’t want to push his luck.

“I realized I might have been short with you,” she continued.

“Might have been?” Han repeated.

“Okay, I was. Happy?”

“Not particularly,” Han replied immediately.

The asteroid shook again, this time more violently. It jolted Leia so hard, it sent her tumbling into Han’s arms. He gripped her tightly on instinct and a moment later, the shaking stopped as abruptly as it had started.

“Okay, okay! I forgive you,” Han said with a smirk. “You didn’t have to throw yourself at me.”

“Very funny,” Leia said with no hint of amusement. “Let go.”

Han ignored her, listening for any hint of further disruption from the asteroid.

“Let go,” Leia demanded more forcefully. “I’m getting angry.”

“You don’t look angry,” Han observed.

“Oh really?” She asked skeptically. “Then how do I look to you?”

Han took a moment to respond, in which he considered the woman on his lap and how this moment was all he’d wanted for longer than he could remember. Well, not _all_ he wanted... but for the moment, it was satisfying in and of itself.

“Hmm, beautiful,” he finally answered.

Leia flushed and made another half-hearted attempt to free herself.

“...and excited,” Han added. Immediately, he knew he said the wrong thing. _Why did I have to push it_ , he thought.

Leia twisted her head around to glare at him. _Why did he have to push it?_ She thought miserably. _I thought for once, he wasn’t going to be so... Han._

“Sorry to disappoint you Captain, but being held by you isn’t _quite_ enough to get me excited.”

“Sorry, sweetheart... haven’t got time for anything else,” he purred.

“Ugh. Just... let me go,” Leia ordered.

“I have...”

Confused, Leia glanced down and realized that Han had in fact taken his arm from around her waist, but she was still gripping his forearm tightly. Han stood, which forced her to stand as well.

“Great talk, Princess. Let’s do it again sometime.” He gave her an exaggerated wink, pressed the controls to slide the door open with a _hiss_ , and left the cockpit.

 


	4. Asteroid Cave

Hours later, everyone on board the _Millennium Falcon_ was working hard to get it back into operating condition: See-Threepio was talking to the hyperdrive, Chewbacca was repairing the shield generator, Leia was welding circuit boards back together, and Han was fixing something that had come loose under the floorboard... again.

Han climbed out of the recessed floor compartment to hunt down the hydrospanner. LIght from a welding torch flashed from the circuitry bay, luring him over. He stood in the doorway and watched her work for a moment. She snapped components back in place and tried to turn the lever, but it didn’t budge. She tried again with the same result. Han sidled up behind her and enveloped her arms with his own, attempting to give her the additional leverage she needed. She instantly reared back and shook him off her.

“Hey, your Worship, I’m only trying to help!” He exclaimed.

“Would you _please_ stop calling me that!” She implored, still struggling with the lever.

“Sure, Leia,” Han said simply.

Leia shook her head with exasperation. “You make it so difficult sometimes.”

“I do, I really do,” Han agreed, looking at the floor. “You could be _a little_ nicer though... Come on, admit it. Sometimes you think I’m alright.” He glanced up to see her reaction.

She snatched back her hand, gasping in pain as she pinched her finger while trying, unsuccessfully, again to turn the lever.

“Occasionally... Maybe... When you aren’t acting like a scoundrel.” Was it his imagination, or did the corner of her mouth turn up in the briefest of smiles when she said that?

“Scoundrel?” He repeated, gingerly taking a step toward her and reaching for her hand. “Scoundrel...” he said it again, slower and more deliberate. He nodded and flashed his crooked grin that he had no way of knowing turned Leia into a puddle every time he did it. “I like the sound of that.”

He still held her soft, petite hand between his own, softly rubbing the spot she’d pinched.

“Stop that,” she commanded.

“Stop what?” Han asked, never taking his eyes from hers.

“ _Stop that_ ,” Leia repeated. “My hands are dirty.”

“My hands are dirty too. What are you afraid of?” Han leaned closer to her. She had backed up against the wall of the circuitry corridor.

“Afraid?” Leia pondered. “I’m afraid of getting my hands dirty.”

“So that’s why you’re trembling?” Han probed.

Leia shook her head defiantly. “I’m not trembling.”

“You like me _because_ I’m a scoundrel,” he murmured. “There aren’t enough scoundrels in your life.” He leaned in closer to her, surprised by how close he really was. She had never let him get this close before.

Leia was trying to hold onto what little resolve she had left. His face was so very close to hers; she could smell the rich dark roast caf he’d had that morning as well as the bit of hyperdrive fuel that had leaked onto his shirt when he’d tried to repair a fuel line earlier and it had ruptured, spraying fuel in all directions. “I happen to like nice men,” she appealed weakly.

“I’m a nice man,” Han assured her, barely audible.

“No you’re not,” she protested, “you’re—”

Whatever he was, he never found out. He pressed his lips to hers and the rest of the galaxy dissolved. The quiet hum of the _Falcon_ ’s tiny circuitry corridor had cast a spell over them, giving them cause to set all their worries aside, if only for a moment, and get lost in one another.

Han had imagined what her kiss would be like a thousand times over, but the reality of it far surpassed anything he had ever dreamed up in his mind. He knew he’d been suppressing how he felt about her for longer than he wanted to admit, hoping if he didn't acknowledge it, it might go away. But it hadn't. For three years, it had done nothing but grow into something that refused to be silenced. Now there was no possible way he could lie to himself anymore. It scared him how much he felt for her. He had never lost control before, but he could feel it slipping from him now. He broke off the kiss and waited for her reaction.

Leia, slightly breathless, appeared to be considering something. Han waited to see how angry she was going to be. He wasn’t sure what he expected, but he certainly wasn’t prepared for what she said next.

“Okay, hotshot,” she whispered. She kissed him with enthusiasm, reaching up and running her hand through his hair. Her touch was electrifying. Han wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer to him. Leia had been kissed before, but never like this, and certainly not since she’d made the Rebellion her first priority. Oh, how she had longed for this! She would have never admitted it, though. Nor would she admit she had always done whatever she could to prevent him from leaving, telling herself that the next time he threatened to leave, she would tell him to stay because she _did_ have feelings for him. She just felt selfish for indulging those feelings. But at the present moment, she allowed selfishness to take over.

Suddenly, a metallic voice rang out, babbling about reversing the power flux coupling. Han wheeled around and for the briefest of moments, Leia thought he was going to strike the droid. Instead, Han gritted his teeth and said flatly, “Thank you. Thank you very much.” 

But the spell had been broken by Threepio's interruption. Leia used that moment to withdraw, retreating to her cabin in an attempt to sort through the chaos of emotion running through her head.


	5. Space Garbage

“Bespin. It’s pretty far, but I think we can make it.” Han commented. He pressed a button on the console to activate the comms throughout the ship. He told Chewie the precise moment to detach the ship’s tether that was holding it to the Star Destroyer.

“You do have your moments,” Leia acknowledged. “Not many of them, but you _do_ have them.” She kissed his cheek and sat back in her seat.

Once the Empire ships had gone into hyperspace, Han fired up the _Falcon_ ’s engines and set their charted course.

“So, how far is ‘pretty far?’’ Leia asked apprehensively. She couldn’t even recount the last time she’d journeyed through a system through realspace. With lightspeed, they could be on the other side of the galaxy in minutes, but without it, it could take days and maybe even weeks just to get to the other side of the same system.

“Without the hyperdrive, we’re lookin’ at...” Han paused while he checked the navicomputer. “Fifteen days? I can try to push it to twelve or thirteen but it really just depends on what the ole girl can tolerate.”

Leia was slightly dismayed to hear how long it would take to reach their temporary safe haven, but she realized that without the ability to go into lightspeed, there was really nothing that could be done about it. And she would rather go to a system where they had a higher likelihood of getting help from someone Han claimed he knew over going in blind to somewhere completely unknown.

“Bespin,” Leia pondered. “Isn’t that the system where you said you won a tournament? The one with that card game you and Chewie play every now and then.”

Han glanced back at her with slight admiration. “Aww, princess. You actually do listen to me sometimes.”

“Occasionally,” she admitted. “I usually tune you out when you start talking about how great you are though.”

Han laughed aloud just as Chewie reentered the cockpit and took his seat in the copilot’s chair. “But yes, I did win that tournament. Won it fair and square, although a _very_ angry Barabel accused me of cheating.”

“Did you?” Leia interrogated.

“No!” Han insisted vehemently. “Chewie, did I cheat in that sabacc tournament on Bespin?”

Chewbacca uttered a low growl. “He said ‘surprisingly no’ madam,” Threepio translated.

Han crossed his arms and nodded with a smug smile. “Told ya. Most stressful game I’ve ever played.”

“Why’s that? Was it the first time you played without cheating?” Leia crossed her legs and leaned her elbow on her knee, resting her chin on her hand. They were going to all be stuck together on this ship for several days - they had time enough to relax a bit and swap stories. She realized with a bit of shame that she’d known Han for over three years and in that time, she hadn’t made much of an effort to get to know much about him.

“I cheated plenty of times. But that time, I played one hundred percent by the books. It was stressful because it’s the game I played Lando for the _Falcon_.”

Leia’s eyes widened in surprise. “You got this ship from winning a card game?”

“Hey, we’re not talkin’ a couple rounds at the back table of a cantina on Nar Shaddaa. This was a pretty hoity-toity tournament with a steep entry fee. I had to smuggle for three months straight just to come up with the cash.”

“Wait,” Leia said, sitting up straight and suddenly thinking hard. “When was this?”

“Uhh, I don’t remember exactly. It’s been, what? Three years or so since the Death Star? I won the _Falcon_ maybe three years before that?”

“Six years ago...” Leia was squinting, trying to remember. “The Cloud City Tournament!”

Han’s mouth fell open. “Are you kriffing kidding? Are you about to tell me you were there?”

“No, but my sister was!”

“Wait, sister?” Han did a double take. “Since when did you have a sister?”

“Well, she wasn’t my actual sister. Her name was Winter. Her mother was a senatorial aide to my father, but when she died, my father just took Winter in and we were raised together.”

"Where's she now?" Han asked without thinking. A pregnant pause followed and he felt like feeding himself to a Wampa. "Oh... right."

"It's fine," Leia said with a wave of her hand.

“So, I’m confused,” Han said. “Was she there for the tournament then?”

“That was her official reason for being there. She was really there to meet with some woman from... well, Corellia, actually. They were working to bring our Rebel alliances together.”

Han suddenly had trouble swallowing and had to remind himself to breathe. How could he have been so stupid to forget that she'd been at that tournament? He thought all traces of that part of his life were gone, but here was Leia, nonchalantly talking about something she had no way of knowing was causing him to feel like he’d been kicked in the gut by a Bantha.

Leia, still not realizing anything was amiss, was still trying to recall all the details. “I can’t remember her name. She'd obviously used an alias at the tournament but she'd introduced herself to my father with her real name. Threepio, do you remember?”

“My apologies, your Highness. I’m afraid your father deemed it information unworthy of my remembrance and bade me to forget it.”

Han felt lightheaded but said a silent word of thanks to the late Bail Organa. “Did you...” He cleared his throat and started over. “Did you ever meet her?”

“No,” Leia said. “Not in person, anyway. My father agreed to meet with her through holonet once, and I was working on something in his office at the time. She was pretty - with reddish curly hair. That's all I can remember.”

Han was about to panic. _Leia’s seen her. She’d seen Leia. Not that it matters now,_ he reminded himself.  _But still, what are the odds?_

“Why, did you know her?” Leia asked nonchalantly.

“What? Because we were from the same planet, so obviously we must have known each other. Did you know everyone on Alderaan, Princess?” Han deflected sarcastically, trying to avoid answering the question so he wouldn’t have to lie to her.

“I was just curious,” Leia said exasperatedly. 

Han felt the safest course was to redirect the conversation into safer territory. He wasn’t sure where things might go with Leia, but regardless, this was not a conversation he was ready to have yet. _Or ever, if I can manage to scrape past it completely._

He gave Chewie a look that plainly called for help. Chewie whined and looked inquiringly at the pair of humans.

“Chewie says he’s going to scrounge up some food,” Han translated for Leia’s sake. “You hungry?”

“I am, actually,” she admitted.

Chewbacca grunted a question, to which Han answered, “Yeah, pal, make it three.” He turned to Leia and assured her, “Trust me, Chewie’s the better cook out of the two of us.”

“Oh my,” Leia marveled. "That's not saying much for you, Han."

"Cute," he said.

“So," Leia mused, "you won this ship from the same man we are now going to, asking for help to repair it?”

“Yep,” Han said simply. “And these,” he added, poking the golden dice that hung from a small hook above the cockpit, “are the dice I won it with.”

That surprised Leia. “Really?” She asked. “Never pegged you for the sentimental type.”

“Only about my ship, sweetheart,” he replied with a wink. “Now let’s go eat. I’m starvin'.”


	6. Restless in Realspace

It was the second night since they had started their trek to Bespin and Han couldn’t sleep. He rolled out of bed and tried to rub the weariness from his eyes, but it did little to help. He had to get up and do something. Since Threepio didn’t need sleep, he was charged with sitting in the cockpit while the organic beings slept and was to alert Han and Chewie if any disagreeable ships approached. Without needing to be in active pilot mode, Han was restless. It had been a long time since he’d made an extended realspace journey. He loved his ship and practically lived in it, but he wasn’t used to spending so much idle time on it. He was used to being busy. He considered putting on his shirt and boots (he couldn’t sleep with them on) but everyone else was asleep, so he wandered the corridors of his own ship in just his Corellian blood stripe trousers, looking for something to tinker on that wouldn’t wake up Chewie and Leia.

Leia. In just two days, Han felt like he’d learned more about her than he had in the three years he’d known her. She had spent nearly the whole day telling him and Chewie more about her life on Alderaan. It made him both intrigued and somber to hear her talk and laugh about stories from her homeworld. Whenever she said the planet’s name, Han could only picture the debris field he’d flown through, not realizing at the time that the rubble was all that was left of the peaceful planet. He’d been there once. It truly had been a beautiful world. Even in what passed for its unsavory underbelly, he hadn’t been able to find a dishonest being to sell illegal spice to.

He realized he’d wandered to the main cabin. Though it hadn’t been intentional, he was sure it had been because he was thinking about Alderaan. And Alderaan naturally made him think of its beautiful princess who was currently asleep mere meters from him.

He passed by the cabin door (closed, he noticed) but when he heard her whimper, he doubled back and slammed his hand on the button to open the door. She wasn’t thrashing like she had been the night they’d hid in the asteroid, but she was shaking her head from side to side. He waited a few moments until her whimpering had subsided. She stirred, and not wanting an encore of the previous middle-of-the-night encounter he’d had with her, he backed out of the room and was about to close the door when he heard her voice, strangely timid, call his name.

“Han?”

It was remarkable how with that one word, she seized control over him and didn’t even know it. The moment the word passed her lips, he felt an odd sensation in his midsection, as if he’d been hooked by the stomach and was being pulled to her – his desire to comfort her and be everything she needed him to be was that strong. He desired her in other ways too, but those would have to wait. There would be time... he hoped.

Leia drew her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs. She'd been plagued with nightmares of Alderaan's destruction and her confinement on the Death Star for over a year, but she couldn't understand why. She hated feeling weak. She was stronger than this. She couldn’t afford to fall apart... especially not in front of him. She had developed a reputation for being so strong and fearless. But despite herself, she involuntarily said his name aloud, almost like a plea for reassurance.

“Han?”

Han cleared his throat and peered into the room, but was still unwilling to enter without her explicit permission.

“You had another nightmare, Princess,” he said softly. He stood at the doorway of her cabin and subconsciously ran a hand through his hair. Leia noticed for the first time that Han wasn’t wearing a shirt. She averted her eyes but couldn’t help stealing glances a few times when she hoped he wouldn't notice. For a few moments, neither one of them spoke. Not wanting to ruin any progress he’d made with her, Han was about to go back to his cabin when Leia said, “It was about the Death Star.” She opened her mouth to say more, but closed it and swallowed with a grimace.

“You don’t have to talk about it...” Han said uncomfortably. He had never been on the receiving end of the Empire’s torture devices... but he’d learned plenty about them during his short time as an Imperial pilot.

“It’s not that,” Leia said with a tired smile. “I’m just incredibly thirsty.”

“Oh, well that’s somethin’ I can fix,” Han said, glad for something to do. “C’mon.”

Leia slid off the cot and followed him, thinking they were going to the galley, but instead Han led her to yet another part of the ship she’d never seen – the Captain’s quarters. She stopped at the doorway, all traces of sleepiness gone. She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow as if to inquire exactly what his intentions were.

He chuckled and said, “Relax, Princess. You said you were thirsty. All that’s in the galley is water. I keep my own personal stock in here. Perks of being the Captain and all. You want caf or stim tea? Or if you need somethin' stronger, I got some Corellian whiskey.” He retrieved his wrinkled shirt from the floor and pulled it on. He’d seen the way she’d looked at him in her cabin and while it sent his ego (and libido) through the roof, he was trying to ensure she felt as comfortable and unpressured as possible. He just had this feeling that if he pushed her into something she wasn’t ready for, he would never have another chance with her.

She uncrossed her arms and replied, “Tea. If I drink caf I’ll never get back to sleep. But you best behave yourself _Captain Solo_. I can just see your head inflating to the size of the Death Star and that smug little smile of yours thinking you’ve accomplished something by getting me in your cabin. Which is honestly a place I can say I never thought I’d be.” _Oh, but how I’ve wanted to be..._ She thought.

Han was trying his damndest not to smile while he busied himself with making her tea. But he was Han Solo, after all. When he handed her the steaming cup, he flashed that lopsided grin that made her heart do somersaults and caused her not to think straight.

“What smile? You mean, this one?” Han challenged with a wink. Leia tried to hide her own smile behind the cup of tea.

“Yes, that one, hotshot. So don’t get fresh or you’ll be wearing this tea,” Leia threatened as she perched on the edge of the bed.

Han sat down beside her but left enough space between them that he didn’t accidentally-on-purpose brush against her. That was a tactic he’d used on plenty of women in the past, but not this time. He didn’t want to manipulate Leia into feeling or thinking or doing anything. Whatever ended up happening, he wanted to be real, even if it was nothing. They were quiet for some time while Leia sipped her tea. For the first time since Han could recall, it wasn’t an awkward silence that sat between them, but a comfortable one.

Leia studied the room and finally said, “Why do you get such a nice bed?” It was true - the main cabin beds were not much better than cots, whereas Han’s bed could easily fit two people comfortably and, Leia assessed by bouncing slightly on the edge of the bed, it was much plusher than the thinner mattresses in the main cabin.

Han pointed to himself and said, “Captain.”

“Hmm… Indeed,” Leia said as she leaned back slightly, resting her elbow against the mattress.

“Oh, I wouldn't do that if I were you,” Han told her.

“Why?” Leia asked, leaning up suspiciously.

“Once you figure out how comfortable it is, you won’t want to go back to the main cabins.” He flashed that devilish grin again and Leia whacked his shoulder with her fist.

“Ow!”

“I told you not to get fresh,” Leia said with a shrug, but she was laughing.

“That wasn’t fresh, that was honest!” He protested.

Another moment of quiet descended upon them.

“Hey, princess,” he stressed, breaking the silence. “You may not believe it, but I really do just wanna help.”

“I do believe that,” she said, surprising him.

“You do?”

“Sure. I just think sometimes... a lot of the time, you go about it the wrong way.”

Han grimaced and conceded, “Eh, you’re probably right about that.”

Leia stood up, set the empty teacup on the dresser, and held her hands up in mock surprise. “I think Mustafar just froze over. Han Solo admitted someone else was right.”

“Oh, take your tea and go back to bed!” Han barked, but he still wore that lopsided grin and there was nothing serious about his tone. “And next time you wake me up in the middle of the night, you can have boring water in your boring cabin.”

Senator Leia Organa, Princess of the Royal House of Alderaan did the most dignified thing she could think of – she stuck her tongue out at him. She couldn't remember the last time she'd been able to have any fun at all. Han chuckled as she tried to stifle a yawn. 

“Want me to walk you back to your cabin?” Han asked hopefully.

“Your ship isn’t _that_ big,” Leia taunted. “I think I can find it on my own.”

Han gave a little bow and said, “Well, your highnessness, if you get lost, you can always come back here.” 

Leia surprised them both by standing on the tips of her toes and kissing him softly. “Okay, hotshot.” 

He watched her leave his cabin and couldn't suppress the grin that spread across his face.


	7. Learning to Relax

For three consecutive nights after Han had made her tea, Leia woke in the middle of the night a cold sweat from haunting images of Imperial interrogation droids and the remnants of Alderaan. The first night, she’d lain awake, refusing to wake him. _You’re a rebel leader. Deal with this yourself. Don’t depend on anyone else to lessen your pain and sorrow._ She hated the idea of appearing weak and needy. But the second and third nights, he’d been wandering the corridors again and had heard her. He’d very sweetly made her more tea (which she was developing quite the liking for) and sat up with her while she recounted some of the details of her interrogation on the Death Star. The third night she’d done exactly what Han had warned her not to do the first time she sat on his bed - she reclined back onto it and before she knew it, she’d fallen asleep. When she woke, she was both impressed and touched to find Han sprawled on a small bench opposite the bed. She was starting to think she had severely misjudged him... or simply hadn’t bothered to get to know him.

Leia climbed out of the bed and went to kneel by his sleeping form. She lightly pushed aside a section of hair that had fallen into his eyes and let her hand linger on his forehead. Han stirred from her touch. He reached up, taking her hand in his own, and brought it to his lips. He moved to sit up, but Leia protested.

“No, don’t get up. It’s still early. Go back to sleep.”

“Are you kidding?” Han said, sitting up. “You’re awake, which means my bed is empty. This thing is not at all comfortable.”

He poked her in the ribs as he moved from the bench to his bed.

“Ahh… much better,” he mused.

“You could have just told me to go sleep in my own cabin, you know.”

“Nah, you were comfortable. I’ve slept in a lot worse places, believe me.”

“Oh I do,” Leia assured him.

Han was fully reclined on his back, ankles crossed, one arm behind his head. With his free hand, he was running his fingernail over the groove in the wall. Perhaps it was because he wasn’t trying or he might not have even realized Leia was watching him, but he had never looked more handsome to her than he did at that moment. Since they’d left Hoth, the cocky, arrogant demeanor she’d come to expect from him had been showing itself less and less. She was starting to wonder if maybe it was just a mask no different than her own hardened warrior exterior. She watched him another moment and made a decision.

Instead of leaving the cabin, she sat on the edge of the bed. Han raised his eyebrows. She kicked her feet up and slid in next to him. His eyes widened and his eyebrows went even higher, threatening to disappear into his hairline.

“Prin— Uhhh, Leia, what are you doing?”

“I just don’t feel like going back to my cabin. The mattress is hard and lumpy,” Leia said with an innocent smile.

Han’s heart hammered against his chest. All the times he had fantasized about having her in his bed and now, here she was... and surprisingly, he didn’t want to sleep with her in the figurative sense... well, he did, just not yet. He knew that wasn’t her intention anyway when she had climbed in next to him, but he was learning to be a patient man. Besides, he mused, it was exciting to let Leia set the pace since he genuinely had no idea what to expect from her. He’d rolled up onto his side to be face-to-face with her.

“Do I at least get to make any kind of comment about you being in my bed?” Han beseeched as his hair fell into his eyes and the corner of his mouth turned up into that crooked grin.

 _Damn him_ , she thought. 

“Not a word,” Leia answered.

Han rolled over with a groan and whined, “Well, where’s the fun in that?”

Leia laughed softly. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d laughed this often or this freely. It felt good. “You really _are_ a scoundrel.”

Han rolled back over so he could see her face. He was coming to love the way her dark brown eyes lit up when she laughed, and even more so when he was the cause of her laughter.

“And the dark side take you, I _do_ like you because of it,” she admitted.

“Sweetheart,” he said, reaching behind her head to tangle his fingers in her loosely braided hair, “That’s the best news I’ve heard all morning.”

Leia allowed him to pull her closer to him. He pressed his other hand against her back and kissed her. Her mouth was warm and inviting and their kiss was tender and deliberate. Leia opened her mouth slightly and Han accepted her invitation to kiss her more deeply and fiercely. She clung to him as if he were the only tangible thing in the entire galaxy.

Gods, he had never wanted anything so much as he wanted her. But not in the same way he had wanted women in the past. Before, he’d desired women with a primal, carnal urge and once that desire had been satisfied, the interest had disappeared. WIth Leia, it was something entirely different - something he didn’t know how to identify yet. While it was true he lasciviously desired her, he also simply wanted to be near her, even without any kind of physical contact. Being around her just made him happy. She was warm and whole and pure - everything he felt he wasn’t. He knew this line of thinking was dangerous, but he hoped in some way that she could heal the broken and missing pieces of himself.

She pulled back just enough to break the kiss, her face still inches from his. 

“Leia,” Han breathed in a husky, deeper voice than she was used to hearing. The way he said her name sent a shiver down her spine. She lay beside him, slightly breathless, as he intertwined their fingers together. She wanted this but at the same time, she wasn't sure if it was the right time for it. Still, they could spend their entire lives fighting the Empire, so she wondered when  _would_ be the right time. She was trying to overcome the feelings of guilt for wanting more personal connections despite being such a public and important figure in the Rebellion. Han brought out a side of her she thought had died with Alderaan - a side that was adventurous, spontaneous, and hopeful. She felt happy when she was around him and events had been set into motion on their impromptu realspace trip to Bespin that she wanted to see how they played out. She knew if the hyperdrive hadn't failed, she probably would have never spent this much time with Han, a fact that she didn't know until now that she would have regretted because she very much enjoyed being in his company (and at the moment, in his arms). As much as she wanted to, she held herself back from kissing him again. She suspected if they kept that up, things would go farther than she was prepared for.  

“That was... unexpected,” Han said after a moment.

“I’m sorry,” Leia murmured quietly, shifting so that she was lying on her side, propped up on an elbow.

“What in hell for?”

“For not...”

“Oh, sweetheart, you got nothin’ to be sorry for,” Han said sincerely. “I was just givin’ you a hard time back on the asteroid. I don’t expect... hell, anything. _This_ was even more than I expected.” Leia still looked doubtful. “C’mere,” he said.

She scooted closer to him. He pulled her into him and kissed her forehead. She snuggled into the crook of his shoulder, her hand resting lightly on his chest.

“I don’t want you to think I’m toying with you,” she said, “because I’m not. This is all just... a lot to process.”

_Please, Gods, don’t let her mention Luke or the kriffing Rebellion. Not now._

“I’m still trying to work out how I feel about you.”

“Hey, as long as ya don’t hate me, I’m happy.”

_That wasn’t true. He wanted a lot more than for her to not hate him..._

“I definitely don’t hate you...”

“Then we’re golden. Take a page outta my book, sweetheart. Don’t overthink things. Just do ‘em.”

“Hmm,” Leia pondered with a smirk. “And that works for you?”

He looked down at the woman in his arms and smiled. “It has so far.”

 


	8. Chewbacca's Story

The journey on the _Millennium Falcon_ began to pass in a methodical rhythm. They were nearly halfway into the route and so far, they’d only had to evade one ship of marauders. Leia voiced her concern that they hadn’t seen a single sign of an Imperial ship. Han had simply told her to count their meager blessings. Han secretly considered their entire realspace voyage to be a blessing, if not a conventional one. Leia was really beginning to open up and relax. She still talked heavily about the fleet and their next moves, but there was only so much she could do from the _Falcon_. As a result, Han realized he had gotten a rare opportunity he might have never had otherwise - the chance to talk to her, uninterrupted with few distractions for an extended amount of time.

The days were spent working on the ship or finding ways to pass the time. Han and Chewie had tried to teach Leia how to play sabacc but that had been a total and utter failure. Leia had tried and failed on numerous occasions to reach both the fleet and Luke. It was made apparent that whenever the hyperdrive was damaged, so was the long-range communication ability.

Leia had given up the pretense of sleeping in the main cabin. It was exhausting to wake up in the middle of the night and try to get back to sleep. Every night, Han would brew her a cup of stim tea, which she would drink while they learned more about one another’s lives before they’d met. The tea warmed her from the inside out. Afterwards, Han’s embrace warmed her from the outside in. They would climb into his bed, sometimes clutching one another passionately as they continued to expand the boundaries of their budding relationship. Other times, they were simply content to hold one another as they drifted off to sleep. They hadn’t fully succumbed to their desire for one another yet, but Han was fully content just to have her in his arms every night. It was more than he would have expected. If anyone had told him the day they'd arrived on Hoth to make it their base of operations that in mere weeks, he would be going to sleep next to Princess Leia every night, he'd have guessed they were delusional. And for every night she’d fallen asleep with Han beside her, she’d had no nightmares.

On the eighth day since leaving the asteroid, they were sitting in the main hold, Chewbacca having just lost another game of Dejarik to See-Threepio. The three members of the group who did eat were snacking on what was left of the fruit supply when Leia asked a question that she had wondered about for some time.

“So, Chewie, where’s _your_ family?” She didn’t know much about Wookies, but she did know they mated for life and were extremely loyal and devoted beings.

Chewbacca made a series of howls and barks and pointed to Han.

“Hey,” Han interrupted. “You know I haven’t held you to that in years.”

Chewie finished explaining the answer to Leia’s question. The smuggler’s normally hardened expression softened. He clapped the Wookie on the back, cleared his throat, and croaked, “You too, pal.” Han tried to subtly wipe his face without Leia seeing. He wasn't an emotional person by any means, but if there was one being in the entire galaxy that he gave a damn about, it was Chewie. 

Leia decided she really needed to learn Shyriiwook. “What did he say?”

Threepio, never missing an opportunity to translate, chimed in, “He said that he has a wife, Mallatobuck and a cub on Kashyyyk, the home planet of the Wookies, and though he loves them dearly, he considers Captain Solo to be just as much of his family as his own tribe. Captain Solo saved his life and according to the custom of his people, Chewbacca owes Captain Solo a life debt. That is where the Captain interrupted. Chewbacca then went on to explain that he is fully aware Captain Solo will never hold him to his obligation, but it would be the highest form of dishonor for a Wookie to discard the life debt after it has been pledged. Besides all that, Captain Solo was inducted as an honorary member of Chewbacca’s tribe and as such, Chewbacca loves Captain Solo as he would a brother and could never bear to be parted from him.”

Leia’s eyes brimmed with tears. She’d had no idea they were that close. She just assumed they had met up on a smuggling job one day and had been partners ever since. As she processed what she’d just learned, she thought back to circumstances when one of them had been threatened and realized that they _were_ protective over one another.

 _There was the day she met them, on the Death Star, when she’d cruelly called Chewie a walking carpet. Han had looked at her with contempt and remarked, “No reward is worth this.”_ At the time, she’d assumed it was from her telling him to follow her orders and his delicate manly ego couldn't tolerate that. But now she wasn’t so sure.

_And then, still on the Death Star, when Han went chasing after an entire platoon of Stormtroopers. Chewbacca had followed him, without question, even though it was suicide._

_And in one of the oddest turns of events she’d ever experienced, when she, Han, and his faux-wife Sana had gone to Nar Shaddaa to rescue Luke - Chewie and Threepio had gotten there first and a bounty hunter was close to killing Chewie just to get information on Han’s whereabouts. Leia had never seen Han more furious than he had been at the sound of his first mate howling in pain. _

_And then, just days ago when Chewbacca thought that Han might not survive his attempt to rescue Luke out in the brutal Hoth climate. She recalled how forlorn and genuinely distressed the Wookie had been when the shield doors had slammed closed, signifying that no one else would be coming into the base until morning._

She looked at Han with a bit more admiration than she had before. “You saved his life?”

“Uh, yeah… Remember how I told you I got a lot of my flying experience?” Han said.

“Sure,” Leia said, remembering. “You were in the Imperial Academy and served as a pilot for a short while.”

“A _very_ short while,” Han reiterated.

“Han, relax. Do you know how many of our fighters started off with the Empire? The reason we continue to draw beings to our cause is that they are constantly being awoken to the terror of the Empire and choosing not to ignore it any longer. I don’t rightfully care where you’ve been. I care where you are now... and where you are now is with us. So tell me about how you saved Chewie.”

“Well, I spent three years in the Academy. I was a damn good pilot, but they claimed I lacked certain desirable traits.”

“Such as?” Leia asked, thinking she already knew the answer.

“Such as the ability to keep my mouth shut and my opinions to myself.”

“Well, I for one, am shocked,” Leia deadpanned, earning a chortle from Chewbacca. 

[I like her, Han.] Chewie growled. 

"Yeah, you and me both, pal," Han said to the Wookie. 

“Anyway," he continued, "I busted my ass though, just to prove 'em wrong. I think it might have been the first thing I actually worked for,  y'know, by the books. Graduated the top of my class as a lieutenant.”

Despite herself, Leia was impressed and her expression must have indicated as much.

“Don’t look _so_ surprised,” Han said a little defensively. “My shiny Imperial military career was short-lived. It wasn’t too long ‘til I was assigned to aid a Commander overseeing a construction project. Only problem was the construction was being accomplished through slaves. You know how the Empire has a prejudice against non-humans?”

Leia nodded. It was a large contributing factor to how the Rebel Alliance was formed.

“Yeah, well, let’s just say there weren’t any human slaves on that project. One of ‘em was so worn down and beaten, he could barely stand. Wookies are known for their immense strength, so they'd been forcing him to carry ridiculously heavy loads for days on end. Commander declared him unfit to work and told me to ‘dispose of him.’ Like he was garbage instead of a living being. I, uh, respectfully declined.”

Leia glanced over at Chewie, hoping that Han’s retelling of this undoubtedly unpleasant time in his life didn’t make him uncomfortable. On the contrary, the Wookie looked almost proud.

“What happened?” Leia asked, fully engrossed in Han’s story.

“Commander asked if I was refusing a direct order, then. Told him damn right I was. I could look the other way for a lot of the Empire’s deluded ideals, but slavery ain’t one of ‘em. I  _despise_ slavery. So instead of killin’ Chewie like I was ordered, I cut him loose and stunned the Commander. Set as many of the other slaves loose as I could before I was detained. Ended up getting court-martialed and dishonorably discharged... as if that mattered,” Han added with disgust.

“So,” Leia surmised, making sure she’d understood, “Chewie was a slave of the Empire and you sacrificed your career to free him?”

“No career is worth someone’s life," Han said vehemently. "That’s a no-brainer,” he added with a shrug.

“Han Solo,” Leia said pensively. “You continue to surprise me.”

Chewie grunted something, to which Han replied, “Hey, shut up, moof-milker!”

“What did he say?”

Threepio translated, “He said ‘Don’t worry, he probably continues to surprise himself too.’”

Leia laughed softly as she stood to collect their empty ration packs. She watched the ship's captain and first mate sidle into their duties automatically, like a well-oiled machine. What was new and unknown to Leia was familiar and routine for Chewbacca and Han. It was evident for her now more than ever that the  _Falcon_ was their home. She still wasn't sure where things might go with Han - it was too soon to tell, but she hoped they would continue to grow closer. She realized that no matter what happened between them, Chewbacca would always be close by. She found that thought comforting since, just as she suspected she'd initially misjudged Han, she also was starting to think there was more to the Wookie than she'd first assumed. She really had to stop making premature assumptions, since they seemed to always be wrong. When she’d placed the garbage in the waste receptacle, she laid a gentle hand on the Wookie’s arm before he went below deck to continue working on the backup hyperdrive.

“I’m sorry I called you a walking carpet the day you rescued me,” she said sincerely.

Chewbacca laid a furry paw on her shoulder and barked a reply that Leia didn’t need translating to understand he'd forgiven her.

Though Han wouldn’t have admitted it at the time, that was the moment when he fell in love with Princess Leia.


	9. The Captain's Cabin

That night, while lying next to one another, Leia lightly traced a repeating pattern with her fingernail across Han’s bare chest. After the first night she’d stayed with him, he’d explained to her that he would sleep in his shirt if she wanted him to, but not to be surprised if she woke up in the middle of the night and it was gone. He’d told her he just couldn’t sleep with it on, and never could, at least when he was sleeping on his ship. Leia had said she was fine with it. What she hadn’t said was that she was more than fine with it. Han was painfully good-looking and she wasn’t about to balk at any opportunity to have an unrestricted view of his broad shoulders, muscular arms, and sculpted chest. She trailed her hand down his side and ran her finger over the yellow embroidered lines along the outer seam of his trousers.

“Didn’t you say you were court-martialed for rescuing Chewbacca?” Leia asked.

“Yeah, to hell with ‘em,” Han said.

“Doesn’t the military strip you of all awards and commendations when you’re dishonorably discharged?” Leia pressed, obviously confused about something.

“You’re wondering about the blood stripe?” Han guessed, referring to the yellow stripe of horizontal bars that ran down the outside of his pants leg.

Leia nodded.

“The Imps took all the accomplishments I’d earned in their service, which wasn’t many, but they couldn’t take that, although I'm sure they wanted to. It was given by the Corellian military, not the Empire.”

"Did you ever serve in the Corellian military?" She wore the same confused look as she had moments before. 

Han hesitated before answering. "Uh... no. I wasn't. But they give awards to their own when they deem it... appropriate, I guess."

Leia desperately wanted to ask what he’d done to earn them. He had both a yellow and a red blood stripe, which was very uncommon, as the red was a first-class blood stripe and was usually only awarded posthumously. Han might be the only living Corellian to have a red blood stripe. She knew enough to know that it had to have been something severely courageous and unselfish. Perhaps he would tell her someday. It wasn't something she was going to ask if he wasn't willing to volunteer to share. 

“That was an incredibly selfless thing you did for Chewie,” she said instead.

Han made a noncommittal sound and said, “What else could I have done? I couldn’t let them kill him. No decent person coulda stood by and let that happen.”

“Yes, well... there aren’t many decent people among the Empire.”

“You can say that again,” Han agreed.

“So, Chewie has a wife?” Leia pressed. “How does that work?”

“Eh, it doesn’t really,” Han admitted. “Hasn’t seen her since they got married. I tried to get him to stay, even told him that life debt thing didn’t matter to me and if he wanted to stay with Malla, I was all for it.”

“And he still left with you anyway?” Leia asked amazedly.

“Well when I suggested that the life debt wasn't important, Mallatobuck suggested she could remove my arms from their sockets for implying that Chewie would impune upon his word. Evidently, a Wookie’s life debt is more sacred than anything else in their custom. At their wedding, Malla’s father explained it to me a little. The life debt is more of a bond than a marriage or that between a parent and child.”

“Wow...” Leia said. “I can't even imagine.” She made it a point to try to learn more from the Wookie.

“What you said to Chewie earlier,” Han said, his voice cracking slightly, “it meant a lot to him.”

“To him, or to you?” Leia pressed.

“Both, I guess,” Han admitted.

"You really care about him, don't you?" Leia asked gently. 

“He’s my best friend in this entire galaxy. Hell, at times, my only friend. I know he’s seven feet tall and he can pretty much hold his own, but I still feel like I gotta look out for him. Sometimes I still see that worn, beaten, pitiful Wookie in Empire chains who'd given up and it just gets my blood boiling. No matter how bad things got, and believe me, sometimes they got _really_ bad, it was always me and Chewie against... whatever. He's always had my back.”

Seeing Han let his guard down and talk so openly about his friendship with the Wookie made Leia’s heart soften toward him.

"Well... for what it's worth," Leia said quietly, "he was really upset the night you went out after Luke on Hoth. I don't speak Shreewook, but I could pick up on the fact that he wasn't happy."

Han laughed, but not unkindly. 

"What?" Leia asked. 

"It's not 'Shreewook,'" Han said between chuckles. "It's 'Shee-ree-wook.'"

"Well, whatever it is, I wish I understood it."

"Yeah, he told me once I got back about them closing the doors," Han said. 

"He did?"

"Yep. Also said you fought with the deck officer for as long as you could to keep 'em open." He glanced over at her with his trademark crooked smile. 

"I was so afraid you weren't going to come back," Leia said again, echoing her sentiment from the night they'd stood in the med-bay on Hoth.

"Nah, told ya, you ain't gonna get rid of me that easy. Plus, you'd had the last word in the south passage. I couldn't let  _that_ stand, now could I?" Han teased. 

Leia still wasn’t sure she could explicitly identify all the emotions she was feeling since Han had come into her life, but she was starting to at least know what to do with them. She pushed herself up onto her elbow and leaned over Han, planting her other hand on the other side of his torso. She hovered over him for a moment before leaning in and kissing him. Han wrapped both of his arms around her tiny waist and pulled her against him.

Long, deep kisses turned into more frequent, passionate ones. Han had sat up partially so that Leia was straddling his waist. She reached for his belt and unclasped it. Han grasped her hand and gave her a sharp look. "We don't have to..."

Leia was breathing heavily. "Han," she gasped. "I've wanted this for longer than I care to admit... and unless I've seriously misjudged you, you have too.”

 _If you only knew how long, princess. If you only knew_. "You haven't misjudged anything," Han managed to say. 

"Then for once in your life," Leia said, a little more forcefully than she'd intended, _"_ _shut up_. Okay, hotshot?" 

Han's initial shock gave way to slight panic when it dawned on him that this was actually happening. He felt ridiculous... like he was suddenly 18 again; that had to have been the last time he could honestly say he'd felt both giddy and nervous about being with a woman. He wrapped his arms back around her waist to keep his hands from shaking. Leia held his face firmly in her hands and kissed him. She slowly turned his head to the side, trailing her kiss across his cheek and down his jawbone. She dug her fingers into his hair and softly nibbled on his earlobe. 

Han wasn’t a religious man, but he lifted his head skyward and uttered a silent prayer of thanks to the Gods anyway. Leia took that opportunity to pepper his exposed neck with warm wet kisses. She was slightly impressed that he had actually done what she'd asked and not said anything else, although she didn't realize that she had rendered him physically incapable of speech. 

 _Kriffing hell,_ Han thought. _She’s gonna be the death of me but at least I will die a happy man._

Han had fantasized about making love to Leia more times than he remembered, but that night when his fantasy became reality, it was so much better than anything he could have ever dreamt up.


	10. Shadows of the Past

Three more days of uneventful space travel passed. On the twelfth day of their journey, after a bland supper of ration packs, Han checked the navicomputer.

“Looks like we’ve got another two, maybe three days to go.”

“And you still don’t find it odd that we haven’t encountered a single Imperial ship?”

Han tapped his golden dice, causing them to spin. “Just luck, I guess.”

“I don’t subscribe to the notion of luck,” Leia said sardonically.

“That’s just ‘cause you’ve never had much,” Han retorted.

Suddenly, See Threepio, who had been uncharacteristically quiet over the past several days, appeared very enthusiastic about something.

“Your Highness!" 

“What, Threepio?” Leia said, alarmed.

"I have excellent news!”

"The hyperdrive's fixed?" Han supplied hopefully.

"You've found a way to communicate with the fleet?" Leia asked.

“Well. No to both of those things. I’ve been accessing my memory files since nothing is truly gone unless it is manually erased. I have located the name of the Corellian woman Winter rendezvoused with on Cloud City.”

Han’s color drained from his face and he felt himself go numb. He cursed that golden droid in every language he knew and then in some he didn’t. Leia, who had obviously forgotten the discussion from earlier on their journey, appeared uninterested but still said, “Oh, okay. Gosh, Threepio that's what you've been doing for days? Going through your memory files? Well, what was it?”

“Her name was Bria Tharen, daughter of Renn Tharen, a wealthy businessman of Corellia.”

Dozens of memories came flooding back to Han, and most of them unpleasant ones. He was trying as hard as he could to remain expressionless, but the result was that he just looked nauseous, which did not escape Leia’s notice.

“Han?”

“Hmm? What?” He answered, a bit too overzealously to be considered casual.

“You _did_ know her, didn’t you?”

“Leia, I was abducted as a street urchin and raised on a pirate ship by its sleazy captain and his Wookie cook. We didn’t exactly run the same social circles.”

“Why can’t you just answer the question?” Leia huffed.

“Because I don’t want to,” Han shot back.

"The only reason you wouldn't want to answer the question is if you  _did_ know her!"

"Why can't I simply just not want to answer a question? Every detail of my life is not at your disposal, y'know."

“Because you _lied_ when you said you didn’t know her before!”

“I never said I didn’t know her. I strategically avoided answering the question,” Han pointed out.

“That doesn’t make it better!” Leia retorted. “So who was she?”

Han tried to think how best to answer the question.

“Wait, don’t even tell me,” Leia pressed. “I’m sure I can figure it out. It all makes _so_ much more sense now.”

“What does?” Han asked, confused.

“Why you wanted _nothing_ to do with the Rebellion and were so adamant about not getting involved. Because you’d already been down that road once before, hadn’t you?”

“Wait, Leia, you don’t know the whole story.”

“I don’t want to! First there was your wife who I had to find out existed when she ambushed us on a planet you claimed no one else knew about and now I find out you had a _prominent member of an alliance_ for a girlfriend. Guess you do have a type, don’t you?” She practically spat. She marched purposefully toward the main cabin.

“Where’re you goin’?” Han demanded.

“To bed! I don’t even want to look at you anymore.”

“That is not fair!” Han seethed. “Sana was _not_ my wife and _you know that!_ And yeah, this may come as a shock to you, Princess, but I had a girlfriend before I even knew you existed. I wasn’t sitting around waiting for you to fall from the heavens, your Holiness.” The door to Leia’s cabin hissed shut. Han slammed his fist against it and bellowed louder. “And not that you give a damn, _your Highness_ , but when I met her, Bria wasn’t part of the goddamn Rebellion. That happened after she left me alone on Coruscant in the dumpiest hostel you've ever seen with a bullshit letter. Didn’t even have the decency to tell me she was leaving in person. When I met her, she was a kriffing slave on Ylesia. I gave _everything_ I had to that woman, and she stabbed me in the back for the sake of the _Rebel Alliance_. It might as well be her fault why there’s a price on my head since she snatched my cut that was supposed to pay Jabba for the shipment I had to dump and left me with nothin’. So, now you know the whole story, Princess and forgive me if I was reluctant to get involved with your rebellion since my first experience went _so well_.”

Han stormed down the corridor to his own quarters. He kicked his boots off with such vigor, one of them went soaring across the room and knocked the cup Leia drank tea from every night to the floor where it shattered. As quickly as his rage had appeared, it dissipated. He felt terrible for yelling at Leia. He hadn't wanted to talk about it since he knew she would think herself just a replacement for the girl Han had thought he loved before. Han rubbed his forehead in an attempt to chase away the pounding headache that had surfaced.

 _Damn you, Bria_ , he thought bitterly. _Haven’t you taken enough from me?_

Han heard Chewie’s doleful moan from the other side of the door.

“Yeah, pal, c’mon in.”

The door hissed open and the Wookie looked down at his friend sadly.

[That was painful.]

“You’re tellin’ me. You were just a spectator.”

[Want me to talk to her?]

“How exactly? Charades?” Han said with sarcasm.

[You know what’ll make you feel better?]

“Dismantling that damn droid, piece by piece?”

The Wookie chuckled. [Probably, but that might just stoke her anger even more. I was thinking more along these lines.] Chewbacca held up a case of bottled Alderaanian ale.

“Oh, pal, you are a lifesaver. Where’d you find these?”

[Crate that got pushed to the back of reserve cargo bay.]

“Bless you, Chewie.”

That night was the first that Leia had spent back in her own cabin she had started staying in Han’s and like clockwork, the nightmares returned. Only Han wasn’t wandering the corridors that night to wake her and in addition to the usual dreams of the Death Star and Alderaan, that night she also dreamed of a girl with reddish-brown curly hair, locked in an embrace with Han Solo.


	11. Misconceptions

The next day, the _Millennium Falcon_ was plagued with an uncomfortable silence. Leia was still angry with Han, but not for the same reasons as she had been initially. At first, she’d thought he had just replaced Bria with herself - that he’d traded up for the ‘newer model’ so to speak. Now, she was just upset that he’d tried to keep the truth a secret from her.

Once Threepio had recalled the name, Leia remembered her too, albeit for different reasons. In the Rebel Alliance’s early stages, Bria Tharen had been a prominent name among its founders. She had worked tirelessly to bring the Corellian Alliance and the Rebel Alliance Leia’s father had formed together to unite their goals and resources. Bria had been killed on the mission to retrieve the plans to the Death Star. Leia noticed that Han had left that detail out in his tirade the night before.

Still, it did force Leia to see Han in a new light. She had always assumed he was a shameless womanizer who “loved them and left them” as the expression went. If all anyone would have told her was that Han and Bria had once been involved romantically, Leia would have expected that Han would have been the one to have done the leaving. But hearing how he was left with nothing but a note and then betrayed by someone he trusted... even loved once... Leia couldn’t imagine that kind of pain. It was for those precise reasons that she had been so unwilling to get close to anyone.

Despite still being upset with him for keeping the truth from her, she knew that she had made the more severe lapse in judgment and if she wanted it to be resolved, she would have to make the first move.

It was midday and he’d avoided her so far. She found him in the engine room, banging away at something that he’d fixed days ago.

“Han?” She called.

The banging stopped.

“Yes, your Worship?” Leia cringed. His tone was colder than the planet they’d recently escaped.

He resumed his pointless banging.

“Will you please talk to me?” Leia implored.

“Nothin’ to say and I got work to do,” Han said.

“No, you don’t!” Leia snapped. “You fixed that almost a week ago, you’re just trying to find an excuse not to talk to me!”

“And?”

Leia threw her hands up in frustrated defeat and stomped back up to the main hold. Han watched her retreating form and resisted the urge to call her back.

*******************

Hours later, Han and Chewie were playing a round of Dejarik and Leia was in the refresher.

“Oh thank the maker!” Threepio declared. “According to the navicomputer, we should arrive in Bespin by midday tomorrow!”

“I’d like to send Goldenrod to meet his maker,” Han muttered.

Chewie chortled as he selected his next move. Han, whose arms couldn’t be reattached like a droid’s could, always followed his own advice when it came to Dejarik - he let the Wookie win. Leia still hadn’t emerged from the main cabin corridor, so Han assumed she’d gone to bed. When the game was over, he stood up, stretched, and announced he was turning in.

Hours later when the overhead lights were dimmed and nothing but the running board lights in the corridors were lit, Han opened the door to the main cabins. Leia’s cabin door was jammed open with her jacket once again and she sat on the bed with one foot propped up, her elbow resting on her knee, looking miserable.

She glanced up when she heard his approaching footsteps.

“What do you want?” She asked.

“If you’re still trying to talk to me, I’m done being a belligerent ass,” Han announced.

Leia managed a weak smile.

“Anyway,” Han continued, glancing around the cramped cabin, “it’s stuffy in here, so if you wanna talk to me, I’ll be in my quarters. Much more roomy in there.” He offered her a wink and exited.

Leia gave him about ten paces head start and followed. When she reached his cabin, he’ already kicked his boots off.

“Han...” she began, “Listen, you were right. I made assumptions and it wasn’t fair. And for that I’m sorry.”

He held out his arms, which she gladly filled. He held her tightly and spoke into her hair. “No, you did what any reasonable person would do. If I'd been in your position, I would have thought the same thing. Bria was that whirlwind first love for me and no matter what she did, I always gave her more chances. I just never wanted to believe she would do what she did. I was young and heartsick and a fool. And I learned a hard lesson from it..."

Leia tried not to ask, but the question had been burning a hole through her ever since she remembered who the girl was. "If she hadn't died... do you think you'd still be with her?"

"No," Han answered immediately. "That last time, when she stole from me... I wasn't kidding when I said she probably is the catalyst that led to the bounty being put on my head. If she hadn't taken my cut of that job, I would have been able to pay off Jabba."

"But..." Leia thought aloud, "if you'd paid off Jabba, you wouldn't have needed to come up with the money that Luke and Ben Kenobi were going to pay you to take them to Alderaan. So..."

"So, I might not have ever met any of you..." Han finished. "I guess you're right. Heh... never thought after all this time, I'd be thankful that she ripped me off." 

Han still had the sense that something else was bothering Leia. "And yeah... if you're wonderin' she was the reason I was so hesitant to get involved with the rebellion. But it was so different, it's almost hard to compare. She wasn't upfront about it. Planned this huge heist and agreed we'd split everything. We were literally in the middle of loading the goods and she pulls her blaster on me and has her rebel soldiers take my cut and load it on their ships and then she split. She used me to pull a job she knew she couldn't pull off on her own. I'm sure you can see why that had the rebellion leaving a bad taste in my mouth... But  _your_ rebellion... you told me about it from the get-go. And no, I didn't particularly want to get involved. But the longer I stayed, the more reasons I found to stick around."

“But—”

“Hush,” Han cut her off and closed his mouth over hers. He tried to express more than he’d been able to explain into that kiss. He wasn’t sure if he was successful, but when Leia broke away long enough to murmur, “Okay hotshot,” and push him back onto the bed, he figured it had said enough.


	12. Bespin

They had been on Bespin for a few hours. Lando had given them a spacious apartment to stay in, complete with a fully stocked closet. Leia changed out of her musty snowsuit into lovely day gown. She’d washed and rebraided her hair into two teardrop loops.

She emerged from the ladies’ dressing quarters to find Han seated on a chaise lounge, cleaning his blaster. He looked up as she entered and his mouth fell open.

“What are you staring at?” She asked, bringing a hand to tuck her hair behind her ear and forgetting it was braided.

“Who’s staring...” Han said absentmindedly.

“You look ridiculous,” Leia teased.

“You look gorgeous,” Han breathed.

Leia smiled. “Any sign of Threepio yet?”

“Chewie went to look for him...” Han slowly lowered himself back down onto the chaise. “C’mere.”

Leia sat down opposite him so they were facing one another. He leaned toward her, intending to kiss her when she said suddenly, “I hope Luke made it to the fleet alright.”

_Luke? How can she be thinking about Luke right now? Unless... No. She’s not in love with him... Is she?_

Sure, they'd talked about Luke plenty of times on their trip from Hoth to Bespin, but they'd talked about Wedge and Janson too.  _But Leia didn't kiss Wedge or Janson..._

“Luke!” Han scoffed. “I’m sure Luke’s just fine. In fact, he’s probably wonderin’ what we’re up to right about now...” He leaned in again to kiss her and though she rolled her eyes, she leaned in and kissed him back.

“You know,” Leia said, “your friend Lando is charming enough, but I don’t trust him.”

“Well, I don’t trust him either... but he _is_ my friend. Besides, we’ll soon be gone,” Han said, attempting to sound reassuring.

Leia’s face suddenly fell. “And then you’re as good as gone, aren’t you?” Han had no answer for her. “You’d be gone now if you hadn’t gone out to find Luke that night on Hoth.”

“Then none of this might have ever happened,” Han pondered. “Heh, next time I see that kid, I gotta remember to thank him for almost getting killed by a savage snow beast.”

Chewie suddenly appeared with Threepio in numerous pieces. Leia jumped up from the chaise and went to seize one of the droid’s limbs. She wished she hadn’t - as soon as she picked it up, oil leaked out and onto her dress.

“Oh, what a mess,” Leia groaned. “Chewie, do you think you can repair him?”

“Lando’s probably got people who can fix him,” Han offered.

“No thanks,” Leia said immediately. “I’m going to go find something else to change into.” She disappeared into the section of the apartment she had come out of earlier, leaving Han and Chewie with the droid.

“Hey,” Han said to Chewie, “You remembered to stash Jabba’s money in the hiding spot Lando doesn’t know about right? I don’t trust his people not to clean me out completely.”

[Yeah, it’s hidden. Not that it matters.]

“What does that mean? Of course it matters.”

It hadn’t taken long for Leia to change clothes, but it sounded like Han and Chewie were arguing, so she didn’t want to interrupt. She hesitated on the opposite side of the door.

[Don’t insult me, Han. How can you still plan to just leave? Were you not on the same ship I was for the last few weeks?]

“Because if I don’t, Jabba _will_ have me killed. You know that!”

[Things have changed. _You’ve_ changed.]

“Even if I have, we _have_ to go back to Tatooine.”

[There are more important things than money. It will break her heart if you leave now.]

“Don’t you think I know that?” Han had begun to pace. “I tried to leave long before any of this happened! But we’ve _got_ to go. You’re lucky Jabba hasn’t put a price on _your_ head by now, just to get to me... and I’m not willing to risk that just because I’m...”  He faltered and swallowed the lump in his throat. “Because I’m in...”

Leia strained to hear through the thick door. She wasn’t sure if she missed what Han said or if he’d stammered.

[Love, Han. You love her. Why can’t you just say it?]

“I don’t know, pal,” Han groaned. He collapsed back down onto the chaise. “Kriff, I’m sorry, Chewie. Sorry for dragging you into all this mess.”

[Don’t apologize. Smuggling was adventurous and we made good money. But we lost more money than we made and it became tedious and repetitive. My people need a cause, something to believe in and fight for, you know this.]

“You never wanted to leave, did you?”

[No.]

“You could have stayed if you wanted to...”

[Not if you hadn’t. I go where Han goes.]

Han sighed. “Ah, thanks pal. You’re without a doubt the most loyal friend a guy could ever find.”

Leia thought it was safe to emerge. She heaved the heavy doors open and Chewbacca greeted her with a soft growl. He looked pointedly at Han.

[You should just tell her.] 

Han cast a sideways glance at Chewie, warning him to hush.

“Beautiful,” Han said to Leia. “You should definitely wear girl’s clothes all the time.”

Leia rolled her eyes as the exterior door chimed, announcing Lando’s presence.

******************

They had been betrayed. And Leia’s suspicion of why they never encountered any Imperial ships throughout their realspace journey to Bespin was made clear when they realized that notorious bounty hunter Boba Fett had tracked them and alerted the Empire of their most likely charted course. The Empire hadn’t needed to follow or attack them. They needed only to wait to ambush them.

Chewie, Han, and Leia waited in a poorly-lit holding cell of some kind, Leia gently brushing the hair from Han’s face after he’d just endured several rounds of an Imperial interrogator droid... without being asked a single question. It appeared they simply wanted to break their spirits in whatever ways they could.

Lando came to retrieve them and from the corner of his mouth, whispered to Han that he was about to be put into carbon freeze. Leia had no idea what that meant, but she knew she didn’t like the sound of it.

“What if he dies?” Boba Fett demanded. “He’s worth a lot to me.”

“The Empire will compensate you if he dies,” Darth Vader assured him.

Han had never seen a carbon freezing chamber, but he knew the basic principles. He’d never heard of the procedure being done on a human or any living being for that matter. _Guess I’m about to be Test Subject A_.

“Put him in,” Vader ordered.

Several stormtroopers grabbed Han by the arms and moved him toward a round disc that appeared to recess into the floor. That was the moment that Chewbacca went berserk.

The Wookie threw two Stormtroopers clean off the platform. Threepio was babbling incessant pleas which fell on deaf ears. Boba Fett raised his weapon, but Vader held a hand out ordering cease-fire.

Han had to nearly scream to be heard over Chewie’s bellowing. “Chewie, stop, STOP! This won’t help me!”

At the sound of Han’s voice, the Wookie began to settle. It made him sick to see it, but Han knew that the only way they would be able to control Chewie was if he was restrained. He got a ‘trooper’s attention and they secured the Wookie’s wrists in the magnetically sealing cuffs.

“Save your strength,” Han said. “There’ll be another time.” Remembering something Chewie had told him just that afternoon about Wookies needing a cause to fight for, he said, “The princess! I need you to take care of her for me. Can you do that?”

Chewie moaned pitifully and didn’t look up. Leia had moved to Chewie’s side and taken his arm, gripping it tightly.  “Do ya hear me?” Han persisted. “Huh?”

Han looked from his best friend in the entire galaxy to the woman who’d stolen his heart. Her round brown eyes were full of fear and sorrow. His hands were bound by his waist, which he regretted because he so badly wanted to hold her one more time. He leaned over her and kissed her and it felt like the first time he kissed her in the circuitry bay of the _Falcon._ Two stormtroopers grabbed him by the forearms and yanked him away, positioning him on the carbon freezing platform.

Vader nodded; a switch was pressed; the floor began to lower.

Leia couldn’t stand the idea that he might die and not know. “I love you!” She cried.

“I know,” Han answered instinctively. A moment later, she was the last face he saw when everything went dark.  


	13. All is Not Fair in Love and Space

Chewie and Lando had expertly navigated the _Falcon_ away from Cloud City and the group was now safely in hyperspace on their way to the Rebel Alliance fleet. Leia checked on Luke in the med-bunk. He was still too critical to have been filled in on their entire journey since they’d separated on Hoth - that would have to come later. As such, he didn’t fully understand Leia’s sorrow. He was still in a lot of pain from his severed hand, so Leia gave him a powerful pain reliever that doubled as a sedative... wishing she could give herself a dose as well.

After setting the course for hyperdrive, Chewie and Lando had joined her in the main hold. Chewie met her gaze and the two shared a moment of silent grief. Still an outsider to this established group of compatriots, Lando understood he wasn’t wholly forgiven for his betrayal yet, despite helping them escape. He attempted to find a way to excuse himself from the room and forced a yawn.

“Well, we’ve got a good few hours before we reach your fleet. I’m gonna attempt to get a little sleep...” Unintentionally, Lando made a critical error at that moment. The _Falcon_ had once been his ship, so naturally, he took a few steps toward the Captain’s quarters.

Chewbacca roared his objection as Leia shot to her feet. Lando held his hands up in defense and quickly exclaimed, “In the main sleeping quarters, of course!” He swiftly scurried out of the main hold into the corridor that led to the main cabins.

Leia glanced at Chewie. “What did you say to him?”

Threepio appeared by her shoulder and translated, “I believe, your Highness, he said that Administrator Calrissian had better not step one foot in the Captain’s Quarters if he enjoys breathing.”

Despite the heavy pain in her heart, Leia laughed softly. “You tell him, Chewie.” Leia rubbed her forehead. After the events on Bespin, she was exhausted.

Chewbacca growled softly. Leia looked to Threepio for translation. “He said you, too, should get some sleep.” Leia nodded and glanced toward the main cabins.

“...In Captain Solo’s cabin, Princess,” Threepio continued for Chewie.

“No, Chewie,” Leia protested. “It’s not my place. If anyone deserves to be there, it’s you.”

Chewie laid a massive furry paw on her arm and spoke in his indiscernible language. Threepio translated without being asked.

“I am comfortable where I sleep. Captain Solo would want you to be too.”

Leia swallowed the knot in her throat and nodded, afraid that if she tried to speak, should wouldn’t be able to keep the tears at bay. She bade them good night and closed the door behind her into Han’s cabin. It felt too big and empty without him there. A pair of his boots and his dark navy pants with the first class red blood stripe lay in a pile on the floor, intended to be worn when they’d reached the fleet. By some lucky miracle, Han’s jacket had gotten stuck in the mesh bag that C-3PO had been carried in before Chewbacca had reassembled him. Leia was sure the protocol droid had put it back in the captain’s cabin where it belonged. She pulled the jacket on, curled up in the bed, and wept.

Just as she’d done after Alderaan, she’d waited until she was completely alone to release her anguish. She knew she was being silly and childish, but she didn’t care. People all over the galaxy experienced much less than she had and allowed themselves the time to grieve. But she was Princess Leia of the Rebel Alliance. She didn’t allow herself such luxuries. Not usually. She’d known it was dangerous to develop feelings for someone... it gave her a weakness that the Empire could exploit. And oh, how they’d exploited it.

She didn’t remember falling asleep, but she woke up to the image of a gray block of carbon that bore Han’s expression of painful apprehension, hands raised in protest and the sound of it slamming to the floor. She feared that sound would haunt her for the rest of her life.

She suddenly realized she wasn’t alone. Chewbacca was sitting on the small bench across from the bed. He hadn’t made a sound. C-3PO was also there, Leia assumed, so Chewie could talk to her.

“Chewie, you ok?” Leia asked softly. Then after a moment, “No, of course you’re not. How could you be? I’m sorry, that was an insensitive question to ask.”

Chewbacca made a doleful sound and pointed to Leia. Threepio said, “He says that you shouldn’t worry for him. Captain Solo asked Chewbacca to take care of you, Princess. So that is what he intends to do.”

“Call him, Han, please Threepio.”

“Yes, your Highness.”

“I know what he said, Chewie, but it hardly seems fair,” Leia protested.

Chewbacca growled and puffed out his chest.

“He says it does not matter what is fair,” Threepio said. “What matters is what his tribe-brother Han requested of him and that is what he intends to do because he loves and respects his brother, Han.”

That brought fresh tears to Leia’s eyes. She looked up at the lights in the ceiling and blinked, willing them not to fall. “I love him, too,” she sniffled.

Chewie patted the bench and uttered a short bark. Leia didn’t need any translation and got up to sit beside the gentle Wookie. He made a short series of softer growls and whines.

“Oh,” Threepio remarked.

“What? What did he say?” Leia said.

“Chewbacca said ‘Han loves you.’”

“Chewie—” Leia argued, but the Wookie interrupted her with more growls.

“He says he has seen Han with several women, but with you, it’s different. He has never seen Han behave like this before. He says to trust him, he knows Han better than anyone. Han loves you.”

Leia didn’t know what to say to that.

“I... thank you, Chewie.”

The Wookie leaned down and wrapped his long furry arms around her in what could have been a bone-crushing hug, but he was very gentle.

“He’s alive, Chewie,” Leia said confidently. “That bounty hunter wouldn’t have taken him otherwise. We _will_ get him back.”


	14. Alliance Council

Leia sat at the round table with the holoprojection of Jabba’s palace above it, glaring at it furiously. Mon Mothma and Admiral Ackbar were resolved not to let her take the lead on Captain Solo’s rescue.

“I’m sorry, Princess Leia,” the Admiral declared. “It is just too dangerous. Jabba the Hutt is ruthless and unpredictable. I’ll not have you go in there and run the risk of not coming out.”

“With all due respect, Admiral,” Leia said icily, “I have not worked tirelessly for over a year to locate Han and devise a plan for his extraction only to be cast aside and told someone else will be taking the lead at the last minute.”

“We just worry that your... personal feelings might cloud your judgment,” Mon Mothma suggested hesitantly.

“My _personal feelings_ are exactly why I’ll be the one going. Because I will not accept failure,” Leia retorted.

The other members of command looked at one another and nodded their assent. They knew how stubborn Leia could be and she would do this with or without their support.

“Very well. Take Chewbacca with you then. Jabba is sure to be willing to pay for him. That will guarantee you an audience with him.”

“No,” Leia pronounced firmly. “Find me someone else. I will not put Chewie in chains.”

They looked at her curiously. Chewie whiled loudly in protest.

Leia rounded on the Wookie. “Chewie, are you sure? You don’t have to do this...”

Chewbacca growled confidently. Leia nodded. Over the past year, she had worked just as hard to learn to understand Shyriiwook as she had to find Han. Chewie told her that it would bring him no joy to be back in shackles, but if it helped to free Han, it was worth it... and that if anyone was going to free him, it was going to be himself and Leia. Leia wholeheartedly agreed.

Leia turned back to the rest of the council and nodded.

“Very well,” Mon Mothma said. “Leave as soon as you’re ready.”


	15. Jabba's Palace

Leia’s heart pounded as she crept through the silent throne room. She feared the sound of it would wake every sentient being in the palace. She reached Han undetected and made quick work of activating the controls to decarbonize the heavy block. It only took moments, and he was free. He collapsed to the floor and she sunk down onto her knees to aid him.

“Just relax for a moment. You are free of the carbonite.” _Curse this helmet and its metallic robotic voice!_

Han shook violently and moaned. It pained Leia to see him so vulnerable.

“Shh,” she said intuitively. “You have hibernation sickness.”

“I can’t see!” He croaked.

“Your eyesight will return in time,” she reassured him.

“Where am I?”

“Jabba’s Palace.” She thought she saw a flicker of disgust pass his face, but it was gone the next instant.

He reached up and touched her face, but recoiled back slightly when he felt the unfamiliar mask she wore to disguise herself.

“Who are you?” He finally asked suspiciously.

The plan had been to release him from the carbonite and get him out of the palace. Luke was to extract the droids, Lando, and Chewbacca. But she _knew_ Han. If she gave him the name of her bounty hunter alias, he would be less than cooperative. And she so badly wanted him to know it was her... She pulled the mask off and with it, the voice-altering device.

“Someone who _loves you_ ,” she cried.

“Leia!” He gasped. It was a cursed irony that the entire time he’d been trapped in the carbonite (precisely how long, he didn’t know) the image of her tormented face as he’d been lowered into the carbon chamber had been his recurring nightmare, never knowing if he would ever see her again... and now that he was free of the wretched thing, he couldn’t see her beautiful visage.

She kissed him passionately and her heart leaped when he kissed her in return. As much as she hated to, she broke away and was already eying the exit.

“I gotta get you out of here,” she announced.

Jabba’s deep, patronizing laugh suddenly echoed through the dark throne room. The lights all came on at once and Leia realized he had known all along.

Han and Jabba argued for a moment and Jabba ordered Han taken to a cell. As Han was being led toward a descending set of stairs, he heard Jabba trawl in Huttese, “Bring her to me.”

Han felt a cold sense of dread settle over him. He had worked for Jabba for long enough - he knew of Jabba’s obsession with beautiful human women... and what he made them do. He struggled against the guards but couldn’t get free. “JABBA!” He bellowed. “If you lay a slimy finger on her, I’ll kill you myself!”

Han was thrown roughly into a cell. After the echo of the slamming door had dissipated, Han heard another sound - a low, threatening growl. He felt fear for an instant, but then he thought he recognized the sound.

“Ch-Chewie? Chewie, is that you?”

The Wookie emerged from the shadows (although to Han, everything was shadowed) and enveloped Han in a fervent and furry hug.

“What are you doin’ here, pal?”

Chewie barked a quick explanation to his dearest friend, still unwilling to release him.

“Luke?” Han said doubtfully. “Luke’s not likely to be rescuing anyone. Hell, he can barely take care of himself!”

Chewie made another comment about Luke.

“A Jedi knight?! Jeeze, I go out of it for a while, everyone’s getting delusions of grandeur...”

The Wookie adjusted his hold on Han but still refused to let him go. Han patted his friend’s hand gently.

“I’m alright, pal... I’m alright.”

Chewie made a soft, sad sound.

“I didn’t think I’d see you again either, pal. You and Leia cook up this idea, then?”

Chewie barked an affirmative reply.

“Speaking of, we gotta figure out how to get out of here before he puts his slimy... anything on her.”

Suddenly, Chewbacca threw his head back and let out a howl of despair.

“Hey, what’s this about?” Han pried.

Chewie harumph’ed.

“Whatd’ya mean, you didn’t do what I asked ya to?” Han looked confused.

Chewie explained that he didn’t take care of the Princess as Han had asked. He let her get captured by Jabba, putting her in danger.

“Hey, cut that out,” Han insisted. “You did great, pal. She looked great, so I know you took care of her.”

Chewie roared a reminder to Han that he was currently blind.

“Well, I can sorta see,” Han quickly backtracked. “For example, I can see you look annoyed with me right now.”

Chewbacca laughed and surrounded Han with another furry hug. Han didn’t argue and wouldn’t admit how much he appreciated the Wookie’s presence.

*******************

Jabba’s guards forced Han and Chewie from the cell and up the stairs, where they were joined by Luke.

“Ah, our rescue!” Han said sarcastically. “How’re we doin’?”

“Same as always,” Luke replied.

“That bad, huh? Where’s Leia?” Han said.

“I’m here!” She called.

Han turned his head to the sound of her voice, which also was where Jabba spoke from. Han grit his teeth and balled his fists.


	16. Escape from Tatooine

Once they had escaped Jabba’s sail barge, the group made their way back to the _Millennium Falcon_ and Luke’s X-Wing. A fierce sandstorm had blown in and was making visibility extremely difficult. Luke had given Leia his cloak to wear seeing as she was heavily exposed from the distasteful excuse for an outfit Jabba had forced her into. Though Han seemed to have gotten his vision back, Leia clung to him in case he faltered.

“All I can see is a lot of blowing sand!” Han shouted to be heard over the gale force winds.

“That’s all any of us can see!” Leia shouted back.

“Oh… guess I’m about better then!”

Lando and Chewie disappeared up the boarding ramp of the _Falcon_ to get the ship ready for takeoff. As much as he wanted to fly it, Han still wasn’t confident his vision had returned 100% yet. Leia gave Luke a long hug, said something to him that Han didn’t hear over the sandstorm, and kissed his cheek. Han tried to stomp down the feeling of jealousy creeping over him.

The storm died down enough where they no longer had to scream to be heard.

Luke held out his hand to shake Han’s. Han shook it and pulled the younger man in for a hug.

“Thanks for comin’ to get me, kid. You did pretty good.”

“Ah, it was nothing. I had a lot of help,” Luke said modestly.

“No, I mean it,” Han insisted. “You’ve come a long way from being that lost looking kid hoppin' a ride to Alderaan.”

Luke managed a smile. “How about you? Looks like you’ve changed quite a bit too.”

“Almost dyin’ll do that to ya,” Han said.

“No kidding,” Luke agreed.

The two men left to board their respective ships. Han paused at the foot of the boarding ramp and looked up at his ship. “How you doin’ ole girl? Never thought I’d see you again, either.”

*****************

“Here, drink this,” Leia said, holding out a thin vial of thick amber liquid.

“Hmm, don’t think I wanna,” Han grimaced.

“It’s to counteract the effects of hibernation sickness. Ideally, you should have drunk it as soon as you came out of the carbon.”

Han looked dubiously at the vial Leia held.

“If you don’t, you could lose your eyesight permanently,” Leia warned.

Han snatched the vial from her hand and drained it in one gulp. It tasted terrible.

“You shoulda led with that, sweetheart,” Han teased.

Leia rolled her eyes but was secretly so overjoyed to have him back, she’d tolerate any number of his sarcastic comments at that moment.

“Now you should get some rest,” Leia suggested.

“No way,” Han said. “I’ve been in a glorified coma for... how long did you say I was gone? Over a year?” Leia nodded. “Yeah, sleep’s the last thing I wanna do.” Although even as he said it, he looked more and more weary.

Leia winced audibly and reached up to her neck without thinking. She was fairly certain her neck had chaffed from the collar Jabba had fastened around it. The collar had also been locked and in their frenzied escape, she hadn’t been able to get it off, so R2 had just broken the chain that tethered her to the monstrous creature.

Han noticed her discomfort and said, “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I’m fine,” Leia said dismissively.

“You don’t look fine. You look like you’re in pain. C’mere.”

Leia shook her head resolutely. “I said I’m fine.”

Han looked visibly hurt. “Ok, I get it. I guess after a year you’ve gotten used to doing stuff on your own...”

Leia sighed and softened her expression. “Oh, Han, it’s not that. I just... want to get to the fleet and change clothes first.”

Han didn’t understand since he’d still been totally blind when he’d been brought out of the dungeon.

“Leia, honey, I was kidding when I said you should wear girl’s clothes all the time. You don’t have to be in a pretty dress for me to see you’re beautiful.”

Leia’s eyes filled with involuntary tears. _That may have been the most heartfelt thing he’s ever said to me_ , she thought. She smiled weakly. “It’s not that either.”

“Well, then what is it?”

Leia took a deep breath and untied the robe’s waist sash. She slipped the robe over her shoulders and let it fall to the floor. She shivered slightly as she stood before Han in the minimal garment Jabba had forced her to wear. The collar had rubbed her neck raw.

Han’s furrowed brow of confusion dissolved when her robe fell away. He felt a wave of emotions all at once: disgust, anger, sympathy, concern. His hazel eyes held so much sudden understanding.

“Oh, sweetheart,” He rasped thickly. “Come here.” Before Leia could take a single step, however, Han had crossed the room to her. He took her in his arms and held her tightly. She buried her face in his chest and inhaled deeply, taking in his familiar scent. She never thought she would get to be in his arms again.

“Did he hurt you?” Han breathed into her hair.

“Just my pride,” Leia said.

He closed his eyes and swallowed the knot in his throat, shaking his head slightly. He felt sick to his stomach. When he opened his eyes, he looked at her more closely and saw the angry red skin around her neck from the collar’s constant rubbing. His nausea was replaced quickly with white-hot rage.

“I’ll kill him,” Han promised darkly.

Leia pulled back from him and looked him in the eyes. “Well, I already did that for you.”

“I don’t care,” Han seethed. “I’ll bring him back from the dead just so I can kill him again myself.”

Leia was touched at his concern for her. She reached up and placed her hand gently against his cheek.

“I’m okay, Han. I promise.”

He kissed her softly and tenderly. “I gotta get that thing off you.”

“It’s locked,” Leia remarked. “Plus, I’ve nothing to wear, I didn’t expect to need a change of clothes and as odd as it is considering how much time I’ve spent on this ship, I don’t have any clothes on it.”

“I don’t care,” Han said again. “You can wear some of mine.”

Han dug around several drawers before hollering, “Hey Chewie!”

The Wookie came lumbering down the cockpit access corridor and into the main hold.

“We still got any of the lockpicks we had from our smugglin’ days?”

Chewie growled a reply that he thought they were down in the secondary cargo storage and he would go look.

Han automatically started to translate. “He said—”

“I know what he said,” Leia announced, sharing a smile with the Wookie before he disappeared to the lower level of the ship’s cargo hold.

“You understand Shyriiwook, now?” Han asked, visibly impressed.

“Chewie and I spent a lot of time together over the last year,” Leia explained nonchalantly. “It got tiresome dragging Threepio everywhere.”

“Leia Organa, you continue to surprise me,” Han said with a wink.

Just then, Chewie reappeared with the lockpicking tools.  Leia kissed his furry cheek and he ambled back toward the cockpit.

“Boy, you’ve come a long way from calling him a carpet,” Han observed.

“Don’t remind me,” Leia said with a grimace. “Chewie was an immeasurable comfort to me while you were gone. No one else understood except Chewie.”

“Told ya,” Han said. “Best friend in the galaxy.” He took her hand. “C’mon.”

They retreated to Han’s cabin and Han got right to work on picking the collar’s lock. In almost no time, Leia heard a distinct _click!_ and felt the collar loosen.

“I don’t want to know how many locks you’ve picked to get that skilled at it, do I?” Leia taunted.

“It came in handy today,” Han pointed out. “I’ll be right back.”

Before she could ask where he was going, Han disappeared through the door. She dug through the chest of drawers and withdrew a pair of his trousers and a plain long sleeve shirt. She had just slipped the collar off when Han returned with a handful of bacta patches.

“For your neck,” he explained. He cleared his throat and averted his eyes, going so far as to turn around and face the wall.

“Han, what are you doing?” She implored with a slight giggle. “It's not like you haven't seen me naked before...”

“Leia, that _thing_ ,” Han said, pointing at the bikini, “is degrading. I worked for Jabba for years and watched him turn women into playthings for his own amusement. I ain’t the most wholesome man in the galaxy, but to watch you undress from that thing just feels... wrong. When you get out of it, I wanna burn it so you never have to see it again.”

At that moment, Leia didn’t care if he ever said it or not - she knew he loved her. A lesser man would have tried to bring that abhorrent thing into some sick twisted fantasy. Han was better than that.

Leia beamed at him. “Okay, then, hotshot,” she said and spun her finger in a circular motion. Han turned around with his back to her. Leia stripped out of the bikini and pulled on the trousers and shirt she’d chosen out of the drawers. She cleared her throat to let him know she was dressed.

Han turned around and sighed. “Much better.” He kicked the bikini into a corner and threw a blanket over it. “Now lemme tend to your neck,” Han said.

Leia put her hands on her hips. “How is it you’re the one who just came out of carbon hibernation and you’re taking care of me?”

“Because,” Han said simply, “you’re my Princess.”

Leia smirked and tilted her neck to expose the affected skin. Han gently applied the bacta patch and let his thumb linger over her soft skin.

"Did you really kill Jabba?" Han asked, sounding impressed. 

"Strangled him with the chain he had attached to that collar," Leia declared.

"You are one hell of a woman," Han said appreciatively. 

"Too much for you, hotshot?"

"No way," he said, kissing the side of her temple.

Now that he was home - on his ship, reunited with his best friend and the woman he loved, Han could feel his adrenaline finally crashing and the exhaustion creeping in.

“You look tired,” Leia observed.

“Eh, ‘m fine,” he said.

“Get some sleep,” Leia insisted, kissing him softly. Han lay back on the bed and knew he’d be asleep in moments.

“Don’t suppose I could convince you to keep me company?” Han asked hopefully.

“As if you had to ask,” Leia said as she nudged him to move over. He slid over and held his arms out, which Leia willingly filled.


	17. Endor

“I wonder who they got to pull that off,” Leia wondered aloud.

Han avoided making eye contact with her, especially when General Madine addressed him. “General Solo, is your strike team assembled?”

“My team’s ready, I don’t have a command crew for the shuttle,” Han said, still attempting to avoid looking at Leia.

Chewie whined. “It’s gonna be rough, pal, I didn’t wanna speak for ya,” Han said.

Chewie insisted he was in.

“Well, that’s one!” Han said enthusiastically.

“Uh, _General_ ,” Leia broke in, “count me in.”

“I’m with you too!” Came a voice from the hallway. Leia jumped up when Luke appeared and hugged him tightly. Han tried to swat away that annoying feeling of jealousy once more.

*******************

Han was furious. Leia was missing, the rest of them were captives of some two-foot tall teddy bears with spears, a worst of all, they thought the Goldenrod was some revered deity. Luke was prattling on about telling Threepio to tell the stupid bears if they didn’t do as he asked, he’d become angry and use magic. Han had thought he was going to die plenty of times and in a lot worse ways than being barbecued on a spit in the middle of a forest. _This day can’t possibly get any worse_ , Han thought.

“Leia!” Luke cried.

“Leia?!” Han repeated. She had appeared from one of the Ewok’s huts, her hair loose and flowing and she was wearing a dress that appeared to be made from animal skin.

 _Oh great, it’s worse_. _Now Leia gets to watch us be barbecued._

Luke closed his eyes and appeared to be meditating. _Sure Luke_ , Han thought. _We’re about to die, but you go right ahead and ponder life’s big mysteries._

Suddenly, Threepio’s chair started to hover in mid-air and Han realized what Luke had meant by magic. _Kinda messed up making the primitive little buggers think the Force is magic, but whatever gets us out of this_. It worked. Spooked into thinking their revered god had mystical powers, the Ewoks swiftly released them. Han weaved through the little critters that only came up to his knees trying to get to Leia. When he reached her, he held her by the waist and lifted her into the air, kissing her fervidly.

“We found your helmet at the landspeeder crash site. We thought…”

“I’m fine, Han,” she assured him. "Wicket helped me hide my tracks and get away."

"What's a wicket?" 

Leia craned her neck and pointed at one of the Ewoks. "That one," she said. 

"They all look the same to me," Han complained. 

*******************

After the Ewoks announced that their newfound friends were honorary members of their tribe, Han stepped into action, using Threepio to communicate, in an attempt to plan a battle strategy. Noticing everyone else was preoccupied, Luke used the opportunity to slip away unnoticed. Leia did notice, however, and followed him outside.

 

Han seemed satisfied with their preliminary plan and when he looked behind him, he realized Leia was gone. He ducked outside right as Luke kissed Leia’s forehead and left by way of the back rope bridge. The jealousy boiled up in Han, threatening to overflow.

“Hey, what’s goin’ on,” he asked casually.

“Nothing,” Leia said, her voice heavy with emotion. “I just wanna be alone for a little while.”

“Nothing?” Han grumbled. “Come on, tell me. What’s goin’ on?”

Leia gave him a pleadingly apologetic look. “I—I can’t tell you.”

“You can’t tell me?! Kriffing hell, Leia, I thought we were closer than this!” Han was angry now, his growing suspicion becoming more apparent. “Could you tell _Luke_? Is _that_ who you could tell?!”

“I...” Leia wanted to tell him, but she was afraid. Han was tortured on Bespin and she was held captive for no reason other than being a known associate of Luke’s. She didn’t want to imagine what would happen if Vader found out who _she_ was to him. It broke her heart to keep it from Han, but he was safer if he didn’t know. She also wasn’t even sure how to process Luke being her brother and _Darth Vader being her father_. Biologically maybe, but Bail Organa had raised her and loved her and he would always be her father. And if Han found out... he might never look at her the same way again. 

“Ahh...” Han muttered, throwing his hands up in disgust. He started to walk back toward the tree hut, but stopped and turned back around. Leia was clutching the railing and crying softly. Leia almost never cried. Something had to be seriously wrong for Leia to be crying. He walked back up to her.

“I’m sorry...” He said softly.

“Hold me,” Leia pleaded suddenly, wrapping her arms around him and breathing in his familiar, comforting scent. Han did as she asked, holding her tightly for as long as she needed.

*******************

Han worked furiously on the door’s wiring, but instead of opening the door, a second one closed. A stormtrooper managed to get a shot off, striking Leia in the bicep. She shouted in pain.

Han dropped to her side with a look of panic,  the wires forgotten.

“Let me see it,” he urged as he helped her slide behind the recessed wall for natural cover from additional shots.

“It’s not bad,” Leia insisted through gritted teeth.

“Freeze!” The stormtrooper ordered. “Don’t move!”

Han stood, his back to the troopers, and tried to shield Leia from their view. He gave her a desperate look, genuinely not knowing how they were going to scrape through this one. Leia met Han’s eyes and looked down at her own waist, her blaster withdrawn and ready to fire.

Han looked like he could kiss her. “I _love_ you,” he said sincerely.

“I know,” Leia said with a mischievous smile.

Han leaped aside and Leia dispatched the two troopers with two well-aimed shots.

 


	18. New Beginnings

Han was bandaging Leia’s arm with what little supplies they had on hand when the second Death Star exploded. She would need a bacta patch once they could get back to the  _Falcon_ , but until Lando arrived ( _IF_  Lando survived with his ship) the bandage would have to do.

His smile was one of victory until he remembered...

“I’m sure Luke wasn’t on that thing when it blew,” Han fretted. As jealous as he was, he didn't want anything to happen to the kid. Luke had become a truly great friend to him.

“He wasn’t,” Leia declared. “I can feel it.” Even she wasn’t sure how she knew that, but she was certain. Somehow, she could sense Luke’s presence somewhere on the forest moon.

Han would have fought every last being in the galaxy for her, even one of his closest friends if he had to... but not at the risk of seeing her unhappy. And if she would be happier with... He just had to know. Han forced a smile and sighed.

“You love _him..._ Don’t you?”

Leia looked confused. “Well... yes,” she answered honestly.

Han had had his heart broken once before, and he thought he had forgotten what it felt like. But with Leia’s answer, he realized what he'd once thought was heartbreak was nothing compared to what her words had just done to him.

He swallowed hard and said in a rush, “Alright. Fine. I understand.” Even though he didn’t. He couldn’t understand. “When he comes back... I won’t get in the way.” He looked directly at her. The pain on his face was almost palpable. He knew that wouldn't be enough, though. There would be no way he could stay with the Rebellion now. If he had to watch one of his best friends with the woman he loved, it would destroy him. 

“Oh!” Leia exclaimed softly. Finally understanding, she almost laughed, but held it back, not wanting to hurt him. “No... It’s not like  _that_  at all!”

Han’s eyebrows raised with the tiniest glimmer of hope.  _What could it be like, then?_

Leia laid her hand tenderly on Han’s shoulder. “He’s my brother,” she explained gently.

Han looked away, his mouth agape, and tried to process. Leia pulled his face back to her and kissed him. Han still looked dumbfounded when they broke apart. Slowly, the realization dawned on him that Leia was his and his alone, and a wide, genuine smile spread across his face. He took her face in his hands and kissed her deeply.

Han suddenly pulled back, having just remembered something. 

"Hold on! Back on Hoth... you kissed—"

" _I know!_  Idon'twanttothinkaboutit, okay?!" Leia cringed, speaking so fast her words ran together. 

Han laughed deeply and heartily, the first time he'd laughed like that in longer than he could remember. Leia had turned purple and covered her face with her hands, groaning softly.  

Han's laughter died down to a low chuckle. 

"Ahh, I'm just givin' you a hard time. C'mere," he said. 

Leia leaned back into his embrace. He brushed her hair from her face and leaned in to kiss her. When he was inches from her mouth, he whispered, "You kissed your brother..."

"Oh, HAN!" Leia shouted, playfully punching his chest. "You are  _never_  going to let me forget this, are you?"

"Aww, sure I am..." Han assured her, "in about twenty or thirty years." 

Leia shook her head but was smiling at him. "You're impossible."

"But you love me." 

"You know I do," Leia said with a smirk. She crossed one of her legs over his and slid her hand behind his neck. She kissed him the way she had on the  _Falcon_  when they'd fled from Hoth... with untamed passion and not one thought of the rebellion. Her only thoughts were for the man in front of her... the man she loved. 

One of the Ewoks, the one that had supposedly rescued Leia from the stormtrooper when her speeder bike crashed, hopped over the fallen tree they were leaning against to share in the victory celebration. Leia, who’d grown rather fond of the little creatures, reached up to scratch his ears. Han tried to push it back over the tree.

“Not now, bear.”

“Han!” Leia said incredulously.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll make it up to Thicket later. I’ll catch him a rabbit or something.”

“Wicket,” Leia corrected.

“Whatever,” Han muttered, clearly disinterested. He put one hand on Leia’s waist and the other behind her neck and pulled her closer to him. Leia wove her fingers in Han’s thick hair, causing him to shiver despite the hot, humid climate of the moon. He kissed her hungrily like he was drowning and she was his only source of oxygen.

For a while, everyone left them alone. But once the fighter pilots had landed and the entire Ewok village had started playing music and dancing and eating (thankfully, no humans), their absence became noticed. Just before dark, Chewie came to find them.

“Alright, Chewie, we'll be right there!” Han called.

He helped Leia to her feet and looked giddy. “Lando’s back. I’m just gonna go have a quick peek...”

Leia laughed and shook her head. “Go on... make sure he kept his word. ‘Not a scratch.’” Leia said as she brushed leaves from her pants. Han mentally added that to the list of reasons he loved her. She understood and didn't mock his affection for his ship. She and Han walked toward the village.

“Han, old buddy!” Lando called. “Listen, a few fresh rebellion fighters have been badgerin’ me to death to meet you. So here they are!” Lando waved over a small group of very young, starry-eyed Rebels in fighter-pilot uniforms who looked at Han like he was a 50-foot golden statue.

“Easy, kids, you stare like that too long, your faces’ll get stuck like that,” Han teased them.

“But you... you’re the guy. With the ship,” one of them said in awed reverence.

“Kid, there’s a lot of guys with a lot of ships.”

“Yeah, but  _you_ ,” another one said, pointing at Han, “are the Captain of the  _Millennium Falcon_." Han suddenly laughed to himself when he remembered the last time he'd introduced himself as such.

 _"You've never heard of the_ Millennium Falcon?" _Han had asked, offended._  
_"Should I have?" The old man had said with just as much contempt._

The young pilot was still talking. "That’s the ship that made the Kessel Run in fourteen parsecs!”

Han suddenly shot the young pilot a look of deep offense and had opened his mouth to correct him when Leia approached his side.

“Twelve, actually,” she said, giving Han a wink.

The young pilots all laughed and went to join the rest of their friends.

“Gotta keep the young ones in line, otherwise those rumors just get out of control,” Leia said with a wide grin, holding her hand out for him.

He stood fixed to the spot and just looked at her for a long moment. Leia was a few yards ahead of him, still holding her hand out.

“You coming?” She pressed.

“I am in love with you,” Han muttered, almost inaudibly, staring blankly ahead. “ _Kriff_ , I am so in love with you.”

Leia turned her back to him and grinned, realizing that he probably hadn’t meant for her to hear him. "Hmm?" Leia asked innocently. "Did you say something?"

"Huh? Just said I'm right behind you," Han said, although he was unwilling to meet her eyes. 

Leia's smile only widened and when Han took her hand, she whispered, "Okay, hotshot."


End file.
